Monster Vs Bigger Monster

CHECK OUT THE NIMOY AWESOMED STAR TREK TRAILER

2008-11-25T21:48:00.000-08:00

TERMINATOR SALVATION POSTER

2008-11-25T21:46:00.000-08:00

AWESOME KEITH HARING DOCUMENTARY

2008-11-22T08:07:00.000-08:00

I love Keith Haring, I always have. From the entire pretentious bullshit downtown 80s art scene I though Haring was one of the true talents who completely did his own thing and gave up pretentious ramblings to make art everyone could relate to. I met the man once many years ago, he even signed and drew a small picture on a T-shirt for me (which my mom threw away, thanks ma) and he was the most generous and kind hearted guy I ever met.

Sadly this documentary which looks incredible is currently only screening in Canada, Europe and Brazil. I hope it comes here sometime soon.

AN AWESOME CHRISTMAS PRESENT IF YOU'RE RICH, A RAPPER OR FUCKING JAMES BOND.

2008-11-22T08:04:00.000-08:00

LG’s newest high-end fashion phone, the Prada II, will now be releasing with a matching Bluetooth Prada watch to go with it. These will not be bundled but sold separately. Available now in the UK, the Prada Link watch will go for around($376), and the LG Prada II will go for a hefty ($715). The phone features a convenient slide-out keyboard with 3G, Wi-Fi, a full HTML browser, and a nice 5 megapixel camera. The Prada Link is a sleek, sophisticated looking Bluetooth watch that can control the phone’s features remotely as well as displaying text messages for your convenience.

IS ANYBODY ELSE THE FUCK TIRED OF THESE KINDS OF MOVIES!!?

2008-11-22T07:55:00.000-08:00

I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS IS A REAL MOVIE!!

2008-11-22T07:49:00.001-08:00

STAR TREK TRAILERS REDEUX (THEY MAKE ME WANT TO SEE THE MOVIE MORE THAN THE REAL TRAILER)

2008-11-22T07:41:00.001-08:00

NEW STAR TREK TRAILER--AT LEAST UNTIL THE MOVIE COMPANY SHUTS IT DOWN

2008-11-16T05:09:00.001-08:00

AWESOME WILL EISNER DOCUMENTARY

2008-11-14T23:32:00.000-08:00

THIS IS A TEN MINUTE SECTION OF THE NEW WILL EISNER DOCUMENTARY AND IT LOOKS AMAZING.

THIS IS WHY WE'RE FUCKED!!

2008-11-14T22:40:00.000-08:00

This article shows exactly why our Government allowed us to get as fucked economically as we are.

http://comics.ign.com/articles/902/902992p2.html

EITHER DO KNIGHT RIDER CORRECTLY OR END IT!!

2008-11-14T10:19:00.000-08:00

Have any of you been following the sad and pitiful journey of the new Knight Rider series? It's horrible and by that I don't mean in a fun or glorious way, it's just plain fucking shit stomp bad. I loved the original Knight Rider. As a kid I watched it every week without fail along with Greatest American Hero, The A-Team, and the rest of the series that helped shape the Dork I've become today.

I'm the first to admit that the original Knight Rider wasn't spectacular television. It didn't have the sharp writing of MASH nor the political significance of All In The Family but it still had a light charm we could all root for.

Davd Hasselhoff's Michael Knight really was a guy you could root for. Sure he was lame in his Members Only jacket and black cowboy boots but he was lame in an awesome way. Hasselhoff never tried to play Knight as anything but a do-gooder loner, an honest man in a world of corrupt ones.

He got the girl but never stayed because it would be unsafe for her, he was good with kids, dogs loved him, he was like the ultimate cool Uncle. That type of loose charm along with easy plots and fun side characters made it a wonderful show. I even enjoy watching the re-runs when they're on, especially the KARR episodes.

In typical Hollywood fashion some batch of bean counters looking to cash in on the "Geek Craze" that they "Have seen significant upward numbers in a positive way towards this phenomenon within the target audience of 18 to 34 year olds" decided to remake Knight Rider (or re-boot a term I fucking HATE). To do this they had to do what they do best and strip away every single last bit of charm in order to cram in as much flash and effect as they could.

The new Knight Rider is a god-awful mess that's built like a house of cards. There are many individual reasons as to why it sucks but they all lean together to form one giant reason as to why the show is so abysmal.

To this day, including the TV movie and the series, I have never been able to get past thirty minutes of it. Without fail thirty minutes into an episode things start to suck so badly I have to turn it off. Want to know how awful it is? This is coming from a guy who actually watched Cool As Ice in the theaters all the way through.

So what's the one reason formed from many that the show blows? It's that everything seems so forced and so desperate to seem "edgy" and "cool" that it becomes Douche Chilling to behold. That's really the overall problem, the damn thing tries so hard to improve on the old one it's improved itself into a failure.

First we have the guy who plays Michael Traceur who is the new Michael Knight but without the name change. In the show he's supposed to be the son Michael Knight never knew who now must take up the mantle after the new and improved KITT comes looking for him. Justin Burening who plays Michael Traceur is so one dimensional it surprises me he doesn't keep fading from reality. He is almost literally the real life Derek Zoolander. He seems dumb as an Ox and though he tries many looks and emotions it's all one thing. To make up for this the producers have made sure he's out of his shirt at least once an episode.

From there the rest of the cast is just as awful. For some reason nobody is human, everybody is a well coiffed, hotly dressed, ultra cool persona, EVERYBODY!! In the original Knight Rider Michael Knight's mentor Devon was just a normal older guy trying to look out for a project his friend started.

He didn't try to be cool or with it, he wore regular suits and he gave off an air of professionalism that played well against David Hasselhoff's "Rebel" thing. The girl that was KITT's mechanic was cute and bouncy but not too pretty and played with enough intelligence that you bought her as a mechanic to this hi-tech car.

In the new show the mechanic girl is this ultra hot, doe eyed soap opera actress named Deanna Russo. With her emotional range straining to go from A to B you don't believe this chick could cook a decent steak much less take care of hi-tech car. It's not that she's pretty it's that she acts like an idiot super model so every time she says something technical or smart you giggle at her.

The supporters are just as awful and all made up to look like they are super cool. The overly harsh and by-the-book head of their Anti-Terrorist Group (yeah I'll get to that in a second) is this ultra slick looking, armani suit wearing character named Alex Torres. Played with alarmingly bad acting by Yancey Arias this guy has so much hair product on his dome and so many tailored expensive suits there is no WAY he is a Government employee.

The same holds true for the main scientist behind KITT's technology Charles Graiman. Graiman is played to look and seem a little too cool by the usually solid Bruce Davison. Once again the producers mousse the hair and stick him in super hi-end suits but we're supposed to believe he's a lowly scientist working for the government.

In fact everybody here is way too impeccably dressed in the latest cool trends and hip outfits. It completely robs the show of any believability at all. The original Michael Knight had black jeans, some fun shirts and a jacket, that was it. You bought his one man against the world crusade because he didn't look like he was put together by a stylist. In the new show you keep expecting to find out the KITT program is subsidized by Armani, Gucci and Donna Karen.

Rounding out the shitty cast is Sydney Tamalia Poitier as a character that means nothing and does nothing except try to look concerned while pulling her gun out randomly. There's also actor Paul Campbell as yet another technician. This guy was obviously given the job because he met the geeky-but-still-cute quota the show needed.

Campbell is totally useless but he throws around terms like "On the web" and "Web chatter" plus he references comic books and "geek stuff" so we're all supposed to identify with him. Instead you want to grab a bag of ten sided dice and beat his ass to death.

Then there's the worst thing on the show by far. The character is Zoe Chae this Asian valley girl type who throws me into fits of violent rage whenever she's on screen. The actress, Smith Cho, plays this supposed technician (seriously how many of them can there be) like some kind of cock tease sex kitten. She's always in the know, always super cool, everybody wants her and she just spurns them while over sexualizing anything that she has to talk about.

Cho does her sexy girl smile and "bad girl" attitude thing until you want KITT to back up over her ass. Remember the chick in high school that tried to get over by wearing a short skirt and batting her eyes at everybody. This is that bitch with a job and she is the most offensive and horribly acted character on the show.

Finally there's KITT himself and man did they blow this all to hell. In the original KITT was a super computer car that was virtually indestructible, could rocket around at high speeds and had turbo boost plus a bevy of neat little gadgets. The new KITT is taken way too far. This thing can do everything but turn into a rocket ship and I'm sure that's not far off.

My favorite is that KITT is able to reform itself into other cars, sometimes BIGGER CARS!! Forgetting the fact that metal doesn't bend that way, where does all the extra metal and parts come from? How does it magically go from a sleek sports car to a gigantic SUV with stopping to pick up some extra sections?

I could maybe understand if it turned into two different things of the same size but oh no, that makes too much sense. Instead KITT is like the automotive Mcguyver, able to change into exactly what's needed for any situation no matter how ridiculous. Essentially it's an excuse for the producers to show off the neat computer effect, an effect that gets old fast.

KITT's voice is horribly handled by another solid actor: Val Kilmer. Kilmer (who I assume had a huge gambling debt to take this job) just ruins KITT entirely. The original KITT voice played by William Daniels had lots of charm and personality. You fucking loved that car and all it was was a blinking light.

Daniel's voice and charm oozed through KITT and made it nearly human. Kilmer plays KITT as a straight computer and his inability to "compute" human emotions makes him as much fun to watch as a toaster. The other problem is that Kilmer isn't a computer so his attempt to make KITT a straight computer starts to come off as a guy doing a bad computer voice and that takes you right out of the fantasy. It also makes the interplay between KITT and Traceur tantamount to getting castrated with a cheese grater.

I can only assume that the producers realized how bad the acting and characters were because they decided to try the bait and switch by involving the most convoluted plot lines ever. In the original Knight Rider Hasselhoff was a cop shot and left for dead. Knight Industries gave him a new face and a new name and he became part of their search for justice.

It was one guy against various bad guys and it worked. In the new series they've made Michael Traceur an ex-solider from the Iraq war who has lost a bunch of his memories. It's hinted that he was part of some kind of Black Ops group but he doesn't know exactly why.

To further convolute the plot apparently the head anti-terrorist guy Alex Torres knows something about Traceur's history that is so top secret if Tracer found out Torres is afraid he'd snap. That makes sense, entrust this multi-billion dollar car and organization to a guy with no memories who is mentally imbalanced. Christ you have to have a steadier resume to be a fucking postal worker!!

And what about that? Why has the entire billionaire-wants-to-do-right been thrown out the window in order to chase the terrorist-of-the-week? The best is that without fail every bad guy terrorist they chase is fashion magazine hot and super cool.

I also love how the Government is OK spending billions for this car, the huge underground fortress it calls home which is fully staffed and has all the latest technology and all for ONE guy. I'd have bought this scenario way quicker during the Knight 2000 years when there was an entire team of cars. The plot now, like the characters, just sucks and makes the show unwatchable.

When the news came down last week that most of the cast and been fired and that they were getting away from the hi-tech terrorist plots to focus more on what the show originally was I thought maybe somebody was listening. I'm not as confident anymore seeing as how they kept the main guy, the doe eyed technician girl, the hot-geek kid and the Asian chick who I want to strangle. That shows me that they haven't learned enough.

Here's how I would fix the show. Turn one of the people involved into a double agent which leads to a bomb going off that levels everything and kills off the entire cast. The only one who escapes is the Traceur in KITT but he's badly wounded. KITT races him to the original Michael Knight who reveals he was left in charge of a huge and largely unknown section of the original Knight Industries billions.

This allows Michael Knight to pay for his son to be given a new face and new identity. This not only gives a full-circle thing to the show but also allows the producers to hire a new actor who can actually act. From there have the Traceur hell bent on revenge with the old Michael trying to tell him Justice is not about revenge.

The two team up to stop the double agent and also bury Michael Traceur who has been blamed for the sabotage. The new character is named Devon as a reminder of the old show and at the end of this new direction he convinces Michael Knight to get back out there and help him stop evil. KITT changes his look to a new car, something more along the lines of the old KITT and they ride off into the sunset.

If the producers want to keep a constant plot thread there are several. Have it turn out that a huge conglomerate with Government ties was actually behind the sabotage and the running battle with them can be an underlying theme.

I'd also have KITT open a sealed file to discover a second base known only to the scientist who died and the head anti-terrorist guy who also died. When they get there they find one person, a girl probably, who works there preparing for the day she can take part in helping out with KITT.

When the father and son team show up they have to earn her trust which they do by saving her life when the bad guys track them down to the new hide out. They fend the bad guys off and manage to get a bunch of what KITT will need on a huge truck so it can keep moving and not be detected (also like the old show). Now we have a new set up, new faces, the old Michael Knight and hundreds of new plots. I think that would actually kick a lot of ass

If they keep up with what they are doing now it'll be the second failed attempt to bring the show back to life. What producers never seem to realize is that these thins fail because they fuck around too much with the basics. If it ain't broke, don't fix it.

FIRST PHOTOS OF THE KICK ASS MOVIE

2008-11-14T03:08:00.001-08:00

I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THIS MOVIE. IT'S ONLY 9 ISSUES IN FOR THE COMIC AND ALREADY IT'S A FILM? ANYWAY HERE ARE SOME IMAGES FROM THE FILMING.

WATCHMEN TRAILER -- LOOKS PRETTY GOOD

2008-11-13T21:21:00.001-08:00

I LOVE THESE LETTERS

2008-11-13T02:39:00.000-08:00

From: Miss Lily Jones

Dear Belove one

Based on your profile, l am happy to request for your assistance because I beleive that you are not going to betrayed the trust which I am going to lay on you Dear Beloved i pray all is well with you and Other members of your family.

My name is Lily 20 years old and the only daughter of my late parents Mr.and Mrs Jones, My father was a highly reputable busnness magnet-(a cocoa merchant) who operated in the capital of Ivory coast during his days. It is sad to say that he passed away mysteriously in France during one of his business trips abroad on 12th.November 2005.Though his sudden death was linked or rather suspected to have been masterminded by an uncle of his who travelled with him at that time, but God knows the truth!

My mother died when I was just 6 years old, and since then my father took me so special. Before the death of my Father on November 12th 2005 he called the secretary who accompanied him to the hospital and told her that he has the sum of
(USD$17.5 000 000) Seventeen Milion five hundred thousand dollars left in a metalic trunk trunk box, wich he deposited in a Security Company here in abidjan, that he registered it as family valuable items for security reasons, he told the secretary
that I should contact the Company for them to know me as his next of kin wich I have did as he instructed,

He also told the secretary that I should not let any of his relations to know about this because he was kiled by them and if they know about it, that they will do nothing but to kill me in other to take hold of every thing,

He told her that I should seek for a foriegn partner abroad who will help me retreived the trunk box and also travel with him or her in other to continue my Live and Education and also to start a Bussines relationship with the person whom can take care of me in the future,

My dear, this is why I have come incontact with you in order to help me retreive that trunk box from the Security Companys custody and send it direct to your country and also to make an arrangement for me on how I will come over to your country in other to continue my Live and Education and also to go into bussines relationship with you hence I am still a child and I dont know any thing about bussines,

I am just 20 years old and a university undergraduate and really don't know what to do. this is because I have suffered a lot of set backs as a result of incessant political crisis here in Ivory coast. The death of my father actually brought sorrow
to my life, My dear, I am in a sincere desire of your humble assistance in this regards and your suggestions and ideas will be highly regarded.
Now permit me to ask these few questions:

1. Can I completely trust you?
2.Can you accept me as your own blood Sister (Or Doughter)?
3.What percentage of the total amount in question will be good for you?

Consider this and get back to me as soon as possible with your full assurance that you will not disapoint me in this issue so that i can give you the contact of the Security Company where my late Father deposited that trunk box for you to contact
them on how the trunk box will be retreived from their custody and deliver to your country,

Thank you soo much for your understanding and may almighty God bless you and your Family to the Glory of God Almighty,

My sincere regards,
Miss Lily..

SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN TOY #3

2008-11-13T02:32:00.000-08:00

TTP DUAL LAUNCH DRAG SET.

HARD TO EXPLAIN JUST CHECK IT OUT!!

CHARLTON COMICS--THE WATCHMEN BEFORE THE WATCHMEN

2008-11-11T12:58:00.000-08:00

Back in the day when comic book companies had yet to be taken over by the big two there was Charlton Comics which gave birth to some of the greatest characters in the entire comic genre. The characters were absorbed by DC and largely written out of the DC Universe during Crisis On Infinite Earths in 1985. Watchmen writer Alan Moore originally wanted to use these characters in the Watchmen but DC persuaded him to create new ones which he did. Here are the characters the Watchmen were based on.

Here are the Watchmen as we know them. Top to Bottom: Dr. Manhattan, The Comedian, Nightowl, Ozymandias, Silk Specter, Rorschach.

Here are the characters they were based on:

CHARACTER: THE QUESTION
BASIS FOR: RORSCHACH

Victor Sage was a TV Journalist hellbent on Justice. When he discovered how to use a technique that allowed him to have no face or the face of others he became The Question a vigilante on the same page as Batman. Not nearly as psychopathic as Rorschach nor as violent. Had more of a detective angle than just brute force.

CHARACTER: THUNDERBOLT
BASIS FOR: OZYMANDIAS

Peter Canon was an orphan raised in a Himalayan lamasary after his medical team parents died battling the Black Plague. Training himself Canon achieved peak physical and mental perfection and was then entrusted with the ancient scrolls that awakened unused portions of his brain making him nearly superhuman. Though he shares the same looks and physical abilities as Ozymandias, Alan Moore took the generous spirit and self-sacrificing nature of Thudnerbolt and totally reversed it for his character.

CHARACTER: PEACEMAKER
BASIS FOR: THE COMEDIAN

Christopher Smith was the son of Nazi soldiers, a fact that haunted him his entire life. Smith become dedicated to vengeance on all levels against anyone he thought was doing the wrong thing. Though similar to Rorschach Peacemaker's sarcastic wit and deep belief that everything was tainted and awful so why try to be better made him the jumping off point for the morally bankrupt Comedian.

CHARACTER: NIGHTSHADE
BASIS FOR: SILK SPECTRE

Eve Eden had a normal mother but a father who was an interdemensional being thus giving her strange powers to travel in and out of other dimensions. Nightshade's look and dislike of being a superhero plus the estranged relationship with her father played heavily into the design of Silk Specter for the Watchmen. Clearly Moore's ideas are further developed and mature but you can see definite similarities here outside of them both being female.

CHARACTER: CAPTAIN ATOM
BASIS FOR: DR. MANHATTAN

Captain Allen Adam was caught in an atomic accident and from that became the "Superman" of Charlton Comics. Invulnerable, able to fly at super speeds, incredibly strong, etc. Moore used the idea of this hero being taken from the Atomic Age and gave him much more depth and a more god-like ideal even changing the look completely. Though Captain Atom has remained in the DC Universe (though in radically different ways) it was this original idea that inspired Moore.

CHARACTER: THE BLUE BEETLE
BASIS FOR: NIGHTOWL

Dan Garrett was an archaeologist given superpowers through a scarab he found while on a dig. Though the look of this original Blue Beetle served as Moore's basis for Nightowl's look, it was the second version of the Blue Beetle, one that had the hero using science and technology, that was used for the character itself.

So that's the deal with The Watchmen, pretty awesome I think.

MY FAVORITE SERIALS IN MOVIE POSTER FORM

2008-11-10T22:33:00.001-08:00

NEW TERMINATOR 4 IMAGES

2008-11-10T11:42:00.000-08:00

Personally I don't care at all about any of the Terminator movies after the first one. The second was just a kitsch movie to show off new special effects and the third sucked HUGE DONKEY BALLS. I like Christian Bale a lot but I'm not stoked on Terminator 4. However I don't like when movie companies leak and then re-call images so here is some Terminator 4 stuff that my little old site is too under the radar to warrant a big bad letter from the movie folks.

AWESOME CHRISTMAS IDEAS #1

2008-11-08T10:36:00.000-08:00

'Tis the seasons to spend money fa la la la la--la la la la!!

Here are some awesome Christmas present ideas for the geek in you or your family.

For the GANGSTA who loves his/her soup or coffee to stay hot but still make everybody know he'll bust a cap in their dome piece, this is the thermos for you!!
BUY HERE

Celebrate our new Prez in style with these two very cool shirts. Under New Management Shirt is available at PRINT LIBERATION the Prez Pez Dispenser shirt is available at KARL LONG T-SHIRTS

For the true Superhero Figure Fan in your life here are some DC Direct figures that require you really know your shit. From Dr. Fate to Gentlemen Ghost, these figures are not for the random comic book fan. Check them out HERE

For your Rat Pack coffee drinker here is the Martini Coffee cup. Pretty self explanitory and you can dig on it at GADGETS UK

I think we've all felt burned by the last few Star Wars movies and what better way to celebrate than the Darth Vader toaster? If you don't know how crispy and golden brown the Dark Side can be then you'll need this. Even burns a photo of Vader on the toast!! You can pick it up at the STAR WARS SHOP.

I don't know exactly where to get these but they kick a lot of ass!!

OK that's it for today, more to come as presents catch my eye.

BOW DOWN TO KING OF ALL GEEKS!!

2008-11-07T13:58:00.000-08:00

I HAVE NO WORDS FOR THIS, JUST WATCH IT AND BE IN LOVE. WATCH IT ALL THE WAY THROUGH!!

SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN TOY #2: SASQUATCH

2008-11-06T16:46:00.000-08:00

This was one of my favorites ever. I remember when the commercial first came out and I sat mesmerized at the very idea of a plastic replica of Steve Austin's greatest enemy/ally. When it was revealed that the stomach popped off to reveal his inner bionic workings I was salivating at the desire for it. Christmas was coming soon and that was all I asked for. I waited and waited, I was good and I marked the days off on the calender. On Christmas morning a ran downstairs to find Sasquatch and Steve Austin locked in mortal toy combat. When I popped out the stomach I was a little bummed that the inner bionic workings ended up being a sticker but I still carried the figure around for years.

DOES ANYBODY REMEMBER UNDEROOS?

2008-11-06T14:28:00.001-08:00

I loved underoos as a kid, I'm not even sure they make them anymore. These were some of my favorites.

The Superman ones were the my fist real pair. In my kid brain they worked on three levels. First they were awesome to sleep in, then they made a great costume once a towel-cape was added and three I could just rock the t-shirt when I went out. They also lasted a long time.

I have always loved Aquaman and I have always been alone in that. The two things I remember about these was wearing them into the bathtub which bummed my parents out and wearing them at a sleep over and getting made fun of because nobody liked Aquaman.

I always liked the Captain American ones but I was pissed they didn't come with a shield. I remember my dad bought and extra pair and used the t-shirt to make a shield for me which rocked.

These sucked because after one or two times through the wash the chest design would start to come undone. I used to pretend I was battle worn Spidey when I'd play with them.

These were the cheaper underoos for obvious reasons. I loved the t-shirt which I wore everywhere but I didn't rock the tighty whiteys too much.

I remember thinking these were kind of girly because of the top but I still wore them. I loved Star Wars that much back then.

Like Superman I loved the Shazam underoos because of the three tier usage. When I got these by dad used a yellow towel to make me a cape. I wore them with that cape until they had to be ripped off of me due to stink. Ah to be young again!!

There were three kinds of Batman underoos but these were my favorite because they looked most like the actual costume. I bought a pair of Grey pajama bottoms and I'd slide the blue underpants over them to complete the costume.

Easily my favorites because they were so hard to find nobody else had them. Plus I could sit in my chair in my room and pretend I was attacking the Death Star.

CHECK OUT THE NEW JOSS WHEDON SHOW DOLLHOUSE

2008-11-06T13:07:00.000-08:00

I am a huge Buffy The Vampire Slayer fan but I hated the character this girl played on it. However this show look like it might be cool if it ever actually airs.

NEW WATCHMEN VIDEO ABOUT SILK SPECTRE

2008-11-06T11:19:00.000-08:00

I still have reservations about this movie but with each new video thing it feels more and more like it might good.

Watchmen Exclusive: Girls Kick Ass

MY FAVORITE COLORFORMS PLAYSETS

2008-11-05T18:12:00.001-08:00

SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN TOY #1

2008-11-05T18:05:00.000-08:00

So since I love the Six Million Dollar Man I've decided to do a post about the toys when I can. I figure why not start with the classic, the original Bionic Man figure. The figure was 13" high with hole in the head you could look through that simulated Steve Austin's super eye. The figure also had sections of the arm that had clear plastic to show "bionics" under the rubber skin as well as a lever in the back that could move the arm to simulate him lifting that incredibly heavy whatever it was it came with.

Finally came the classic red jumpsuit and awesome red adidas. I loved these figures, I went through 5 of them as a kid.

FIRST NEW JOHN CARPENTER FILM IN SEVEN YEARS!!

2008-11-05T17:57:00.000-08:00

Though I was not a fan on any level of Vampires From Mars or Escape From LA I still love John Carpenter. Even the idea that his new prison movie stars Nicolas Cage and is actually a prison movie with no supernatural or Sci-fi properties doesn't deter me. This is the poster for it and I must say I'm amped!!

MICHAEL CRICHTON PASSES AWAY

2008-11-05T17:52:00.001-08:00

Most people know Michael Crichton as the author of Jurassic Park, Sphere, The Andromeda Strain and many other classic sci-fi books. He also helmed one of my favorite movies Westworld as well as The great Train Robbery.

I didn't love all of his novels but I was always excited to read them. He is a true talent that will be missed.

AWESOME ART SPIEGELMAN BOOK

2008-11-05T17:46:00.000-08:00

The incredible comic artists and writer Art Spiegelman was responsible for one of the greatest and most important graphic novels ever printed with Maus. This is a book of his work from his early days as well as an amazing essay on his life in comics. A must have for any true comic fan!!

IANN'S COMIC BOOK FOLDER 11/05/08

2008-11-04T22:51:00.001-08:00

SUB-MARINER #3

This min-series has been pretty incredible. Taking the point of view of Prince Namor as sea monster, an unknown entity that terrifies seamen this issue is where the scientist sent to study him finally witnesses the power of the King Of Atlantis.

THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #576

The continuation of the smash face fight with the new Hammerhead who has pretty much beaten Spidey to a pulp. Spidey's gonna need new moves to beat the new Hammerhead.

ADAM: LEGEND OF THE BLUE MARVEL #1

An unstoppable super-villain attacks New York City--and the Mighty Avengers fall! Where did Anti-Man come from? And who can stop his overwhelming rampage?! Now Iron Man races to find the only man who’s ever defeated Anti-Man--
THE BLUE MARVEL…a hero the world hasn’t seen since 1961

ADVENTURE COMICS SPEICAL FEATURING THE GUARDIAN

Building off of last months Jimmy Olsen one-shot this tie in to New Krypton shows us the history behind one of the all time great superheroes The Guardian.

SHOW TIMES TO SEE MY NAME IS BRUCE AND MEET THE MAN HIMSELF

2008-11-04T13:53:00.000-08:00

Here's a movie I've been waiting and waiting for!! My Name Is Bruce starring and created by the MAN Bruce Campbell is finally hitting theaters. During its first run Bruce will be there for a Q&A so try and make it if you can. After the trailer are the dates!!

11/5 Philadelphia, PA: The Ritz
400 Ranstead Street
Philadelphia, PA 19106

11/7 Boston, MA: Kendall Theatre
1 Kendall Square
Cambridge, MA 02139

11/9 Hartford, CT: Cinema City
235 Brainard Rd
Hartford, CT 06114

11/12 New Haven, CT: Criterion Cinemas
86 Temple St
New Haven, CT 06510

11/14 Baltimore, MD: Harbor East
645 S. President Street,
Baltimore, MD 21202

11/15 Washington D.C.: E Street Theatre
555 11th Street NW
Washington, DC 20004

11/19 Columbus, OH: Landmark's Gateway Theater
1550 N. High St.
Columbus Ohio 43201

11/20 Toledo, OH: Levis Commons
3201 Levis Commons Blvd
Perrysburg, OH 43551

11/21-23 Detroit, MI: Main Art Theatre
118 N Main St,
Royal Oak, MI

11/28-30 Chicago, IL: Century Centre Theatre
2828 N Clark St
Chicago, IL 60657

12/1 Decatur, IL: Huston's Avon Theatre
426 N. Water St.
Decatur, Illinois 62523

12/3 Madison, WI: Sundance
430 N Midvale Blvd
Madison, WI 53705

12/5-7 Minneapolis, MN:Lagoon Theatre
1320 Lagoon, Avenue
Minneapolis, MN 55408

12/12 Seattle, WA: Varsity
4329 University Way NE
Seattle, WA 98105

12/13-14 Portland, OR: Fox Theatre (AKA Fox Tower 10)
846 SW Park Ave
Portland, OR 97205

12/15 Medford, OR: TBD

12/17 San Francisco, CA: Embarcadero Center
One Embarcadero Center, Promenade Level
San Francisco, CA 94111
-or-
Bridge Theatre
3010 Geary Blvd
San Francisco, CA 94118

12/18 Berkeley, CA: California Theatre
2113 Kittredge Street (Between Oxford and Shattuck)
Berkeley, CA 94704

12/19-21 Los Angeles, CA: Nuart Theatre
11272 Santa Monica Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90025

TOP TEN REASONS I HAVE NO DESIRE TO SEE THE MOVIE FANBOYS

2008-11-04T13:37:00.000-08:00

A new trailer for FANBOYS has been released. This movie has been languishing in new release hell for years but apparently February 9th is the day. For me personally I can't stand this movie. I'm just not down with the whole "LOOK AT ME I'M A GEEK" bullshit nor do I involve myself with things that are so obviously just trying to hit the right Geek Nostalgia points to sell tickets. I'd rather people take things like comics and sci-fi and treat them with respect and make quality products out of it as Chris Nolan did with Batman or Richard Donner with Superman. Anyway, here's the trailer:

Here are my reasons I hate it:

1. Star Wars is now an awful memory, the new three films have all but wiped away what made it so wonderful and this look at how we all felt before Phantom Menace is annoying.

2. One of the guys actually works in a comic book store, are we all done with this cliche yet?

3. One nerd interrupts another nerd who is about to get some from a hot girl, another cliche I'm all set with.

4. I'm tired of William Shatner as some pimped out cameo demi-god. Enough already, please.

5. Anything other than the live footage of Harry Knowles being murdered should be cut out of any film.

6. Kevin Smith in a movie does not instantly give it some cool creedo because the guy is a hack anyway.

7. I'm all set with "how many nostalgic things can we cram in a film" movies.

8. The enigma and luster of George Lucas Ranch is long dead.

9. Road trip in the wacky van, yeah thanks but no thanks.

10. Wow, yet another scene where little kids beat up nerds. SOOOO FUNNNNYYYYYY

I have Star Wars characters tattooed on my body, I met George Lucas, there was no bigger fan of Star Wars than I and I still think this movie is stupid. I get it, I understand it, I just think it's not worth seeing.

MY PICKS FOR DVDS BEING RELEASED 11/4/08 (PLUS SOMETHING MAKE YOU GIVE UP ON LIFE)

2008-11-03T13:31:00.000-08:00

What better way to ring in the new President (PLEASE GOD OBAMA) then the purchasing of DVDs for your home viewing enjoyment. This is an odd week because a lot of these are things I want to see but haven't yet. Before we start here is something from one of the worst Made For TV Movies EVER. The movie is Archie: Return To Riverdale and the clip is, well, just watch. It may be closer to hell then if McCain wins tomorrow. Check it out:

Once you're done throwing up (keep in mind I OWN this movie) then check out my DVD picks.

A WOMAN UNDER THE INFLUENCE

This is one of the many brilliant films by director John Casavettes. Gena Rowlands (Casavettes wife) plays an alcoholic mother trying to keep it together in this film that actually earns the title "gritty". Nobody was better at directing the grime and black hearted awfulness that is day to day life than Casavettes. Simple a brilliant film!!

POPEYE 1941-1943

If you're a Popeye fan (which everybody should be) then be ready to jump up and shout because the second installment of the old school cartoons is back. These are the cartoons based on Thimble Theater, the original birth-strip for Popeye The Sailor. Remastered and looking pretty amazing, this is a must have.

KUNG-FU PANDA

I'm not a Jack Black fan and I didn't see this in the theaters but for some reason I really want to. It looks like cute harmless fun in the vein of old Disney or Pixar films. It might suck but I'm still saying buy it!!

GET SMART

Another movie I didn't see but mainly because I didn't have the time. I love Steve Carrell, everything he does makes me laugh. I even laughed out loud at Evan Almighty, how weird is that!? All the previews I saw of this made me laugh so I can't see it being too awful.

EMMETT OTTER'S JUGBAND CHRISTMAS

Sure people love the Rudolph stuff and the Frosty cartoon but to me this is the MAIN JAM when it comes to Christmas specials. Emmett wants to buy his mom a piano and his Ma wants to buy him a guitar. Being broke they enter the same talent contest without knowing it to try and win the prize money. Based on the book by Russell Hoban this Jim Henson adaptation is Henson magic at it's finest. It also has the greatest rock band ever The Riverbottom Nightmare Band!!

COMIC BOOKS UNBOUND

What looks like an awesome documentary covering the weird, wild and often awful trip from comic books to movies our heroes take. Covering everything from the first movie attempts to the latest triumphs this seems like a kick ass film.

A CHRISTMAS STORY ULTIMATE COLLECTION

My other MAIN JAM for Christmas is this timeless tale of a boy, his imagination his love of a Red Ryder carbon BB Rifle. Fragile--it must be french? You'll shoot your eye out? Soap Poisoning blindness? There's so much good shit in this movie it's hard to process it all. Just go buy it.

BOURNE THREE PACK

"I always thought Matt Damon was kind of a Striesand but he's rocking the shit in this movie." That's a quote about the Bourne Identity from 40 Year Old Virgin and it's the truth. Damon kicks ass in these three films as Jason Bourne the assassin trying to find out who he really is. All three movies are smart as well as action packed. I can't wait for this!!

BATMAN THE COMPLETE ANIMATED SERIES.

The greatest thing to happen to Batman since Denny O'Neil and Neal Adams was this animated show by Paul Davini. It's perfect through and through from the art to the writing to the vibe of the show. Mark Hamil's amazing Joker, the introduction of Harley Quinn, this set is THE ONE!!

That's it for this week, now go buy some DVDs and spare me this Blu-ray bullshit. When those go down to normal DVD prices I'll fuck with it but not before.

GEEK NEWS AND MY SPIFFY TAKE ON IT FOR 11/3

2008-11-03T09:36:00.000-08:00

Hey everybody, how was your Halloween? Mine was cool, didn't really go out because I realized if I saw one more Joker or sexy Sarah Palin I was going to start mowing people down with a rental car. However Sunday kicked a lot of ass because my company Isolation Disorder Press had a table at the Boston Comic Convention with Bernie Wrightson as the guest. I not only got my Frankenstein hardcover signed but he took and awesome photo with me, check it out.

OK so onto the geek news:

So Jeph Loeb and Jesse Alexander (writers/producers) were fired off of the show Heroes due to failing ratings and budget excess. I'm split on all this shit going down with Heroes and the people surrounding it. On one hand I'm amped because this show sucked, it sucked from the first day it aired and I'm glad people are catching on. This was a sham show where "cool hipsters" got to pretend they were down with comic books. On the other hand this backlash against Heroes may be setting us up for a backlash across all the geek/comic movie stuff going on. I have a feeling people are getting over saturated on it.

Apparently not happy enough to ass-rape the original Halloween, the idiots over at New Line have greenlit a re-make of Halloween 2. Based on how the original Halloween ended I'm interested in how much suck they can squeeze out of chapter 2. The best news is that director hack Zombie isn't returning for it.

Zack and Miri Make A Porno tanked at the box office. Come back later today for an article I'll post on why I thinkt hat happened.

Here's an interesting tidbit. Even though the Planet Of The Apes remake sucked as much pure asshole as it did and lost lots of money for the corporate swine, apparently a remake of Conquest Of The Planet Of The Apes is due soon. The Conquest storyline originally showed how the Apes rose up to defeat humanity and take over. Apparently this will be the same plot (though after the end of the Planet remake I'm not sure how) but take place in modern society. I fucking hate hollywood.

Apparently the long sought after Bubba Nosferatu pre-quel to the brilliant Bubba Ho Tep has just been fast tracked. This prequel deals with young Elvis shooting a movie and facing off against a she-vampire. Instead of Bruce Campbell Elvis will be played by Hellboy himself Ron Perlman with it-actor Paul Giamatti as The Colonel. I'm actually kind of amped on this.

Spider-Man 4 will be written by Pulitzer Prize winning playwright David Lindsay-Abair, mostly well known for the play "Rabbit Hole". Rumors persist that the Lizard will be the villain this time.

And finally it looks like the MAN J. Michael Straczynski will be penning the remake of Forbidden Planet. I'm split here to because I love J. Michael's writing but see no need for a Forbidden Planet remake.

OK That's it for today. Be sure to check back for my Zack And Miri article and my picks on what to buy tomorrow on DVD.

A SPOOKY HALLOWEEN WALK DOWN MEMORY LANE

2008-10-31T13:28:00.000-07:00

Halloween used to be my favorite holiday (second only to christmas) especially when I was a kid. The older you get the more the holiday becomes bogged down in drunken parties, trying to get laid (which you spend all year doing anyway) and really pushing yourself to have an "awesome time" which is usually a let down. When I was a kid you went out, got candy, ate it and fell asleep. That kicked ass.

Anyway, I found some photos of old costumes I used to have so I took a trip down memory lane.

CHARLIE BROWN (4 Years Old):

This costume didn't fit very well and my mom told me I was pissed because they didn't have Linus so I wore this but carried a blanket. I was a weird kid.

BATMAN (5 Years Old)

It pains me to say this but I loved Batman because of the old TV show when I was a kid. Apparently I ran through school with this on shouting BAM POW BIFF. It saddens me because when I discovered the comics at the ripe old age of 7 I realized how awful the show was.

DARTH VADER (6 Years Old)

This is the first of two times I was the Dark Lord Of The Sith. My father hated this costume because it wasn't Vader, it was a mask and picture of Vader. He just never could deal with how cheap these costumes were. Years later he would build me a Darth Vader costume that was amazing. Sadly I have no photo of it.

Evel Knievel (7 Years Old)

The birthday before this Halloween my mom and dad bought me the Evel Knievel wind up stunt motorcycle and I became obsessed with the Last Of The Gladiators. I wore this costume for Halloween and then continued to wear the mask until it literally fell apart.

JAWS (8 Years Old)

For some reason when this movie came out I was obsessed with it even though my parents never let me see it. A year or so later it was on this new thing called HBO and a neighbor had it. I watched the movie and lost my shit, loved it. I saw this costume and freaked. Again I wore the mask way way after Halloween had ended.

THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN (9 Years Old)

This is an interesting story. My two big loves at 9 were the Six Million Dollar man and Spider-Man. I bought this costume early on while my father kept begging me to let him make me a costume. I finally relented, sure that he couldn't do anything as awesome as this Six Million Dollar Man jam and when he blew it I'd have this to fall back on. This is the only photo of me in these costumes I could find. Funny enough I didn't end up wearing it.

SPIDER-MAN (9 Years Old)

This was the costume my father hand made for me. He stitched it all together and hand drew the webs. I remember seeing it and freaking out, not believing he didn't buy it in the store. My poor father had doomed himself though because from that Halloween on he had to make all my costumes.

From there on my dad made me Darth Vader, Peter Pan, Boba Fett before I hit 13 and became too cool for trick or treating. It became much cooler to hang at a friend's house and watch horror movies or go to some school dance. My father building these costumes are some of the fondest memories I have of childhood and of him. I miss him terribly but I cherish the time we did have together. I don't think any father loved his child more.

LEATHERFACE (34 Years Old)

So between thirteen and 34 a lot happened and none of it was Halloween oriented. This was my first year in Boston and I was heading to a Halloween party. I was too fat at the time to be Michael Myers so I went with Leatherface. Funny story, when I was in the backyard spraying blood on the apron I got charged by a skunk. I screamed and ran inside, realizing I hate nature.

MICHAEL MYERS (35 Years Old)

I finally lost enough weight to be Michael Myers and here I was in all my glory. Not a hard costume to make but a fun one. I should have used the knife on my bitch ass ex-girlfriend. Man did she suck.

THE JOKER (37 Years Old)

Due to having to work Halloween in my 36th year resulted in nothing. This year I was the Joker for Free Comic Book day and it was a huge hit. I wanted to carry it over to Halloween but after the Dark Knight movie I realized there would be two thousand frat jock date rapists wearing it screaming drunkenly "WHY SO SERIOUS". So I opted out. Tomorrow I'll post what I ended up being. This is a photo of myself and my AWESOME girlfriend Sara who dressed up as Harley Quinn.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!! AWESOME PUMPKIN CARVINGS!!

2008-10-31T01:48:00.001-07:00

IANN'S COMIC BOOK FOLDER 10/29/08

2008-10-28T21:00:00.000-07:00

THOR #11

While Thor continues to travel into the city of Midgard Loki's up to his/her old tricks. Yeah when the thunder god returned Loki to life he came back as a woman which was weird but also made the character more interesting. Loki's still a jerk but his/her hand is about to be tipped.

BATMAN/SUPERMAN #53

On the heels of one of the best story arcs in recent years trying to rid the world of Kryptonite this constantly awesome title is set to begin yet another kick ass idea. In this issue Superman's powers somehow jump into Batman's body making the Dark Knight invincible and leaving Superman powerless. This should be pretty fucking killer.

SUPERMAN #681

Building off of the events from the New Krypton one shot Kandor is out of the bottle and full sized. Now 100,000 Kryptonians all with Superman type powers are on Earth and the humans are none to happy. Plus Superman has to say goodbye to one of his long time secondary characters and the guy behind the Atlas attacks makes another move.

Amazing Spider-Man #575

After the events of Norman Osbourne's attack on Spidey there's a new threat in town in the form of Hammerhead whose trying to get all the gang members under one umbrella for Mr. Negative. Spidey has his work cut out for him. I'm not a big fan of the Brand New Day story arc but I have to say, the last eight issues of spiderman have been pretty awesome.

SECRET INVASION THOR #3

Thor and Beta Ray Bill are all the stands between the god-killing Skrull army and the end of Asgard. Do you need any other reason so buy this? I THINK NOT!!

RAGE OF THE RED LANTERNS

Since the first appearance of Hal Jordan there has been hints of something called The Blackest Night prophecy. This one shot is the intro to that story arc. Here the violent and bloodthirsty Red Lanterns are out to kill the greatest Lantern Sinestro but the GL Corps stand in their way.

THE ASTOUNDING WOLFMAN #9

Robert Kirkman (Walking Dead, Invincible) takes us deeper into the story of a man living with his wolfman curse. On the run from the law, his identity public and having lost his family Gary Hampton now uses all of his new gifts simply for survival.

THE SWORD #12

What happens when a human tries to kill a God? Read this and find out as Dara's battle with Zakros comes to a bloody end.

LEGION OF SUPERHEROES #47

War looms, traitors plot and Brainiac 5 is being haunted by his old girlfriend. All this while the idiots at DC cancel one of their best books at issue 50.

JOKER

With a visual style very similar to that of The Dark Knight film this story of a newly freed Joker out to take back his city. This comic has fallen under some scrutiny due to writer Brian Azzarello (100 Bullets) and artist Lee Berjemo claim that this book was put together pre-Dark Knight. Check it out for yourselves.

MARVEL 1985 #6

The last issue in this brilliant series where a young boy brings the Marvel world into the real one. The villains are overrunning our planet but now the heroes have arrived so the ass kicking shall now begin. This is a must have!!!

OK go buy some comic books!!

20 QUESTIONS WITH STEVE NILES (NOT SURE WHEN)

2008-10-28T19:07:00.000-07:00

I've been writing my own comics for a few years now and guys like Steve Niles keep me doing it when nobody else seems to care. He wrote a little vampire comic called 30 Days Of Night, maybe you've heard of it? Steve was just another struggling comic geek before he made it big and now he's able to write his own ticket. Even being a big deal in Hollywood and on the comic scene Steve was kind enough to sit down with Our Worlds At War and do an interview!!

OUR WORLDS AT WAR: So what’s going on in the world of Steve Niles?

STEVE NILES: Work, work and more work. This weekend I’m working of Batman: Gotham After Midnight, Criminal Macabre: Cellblock 666 and a new Bernie Wrightson series for IDW called Dead She Said.

OWAW: This many years later does is still surprise you the impact of 30 Days Of Night? Why do you think that is?

SN: I’m constantly shocked. It was just a little vampire comic and then it exploded. I think people were just looking for a fresh approach and I guess they see that in 30 Days of Night. Works for me and Ben.

OWAW: So much of the book was cut out of the movie, why? Did it bum you out at all?

SN: Yeah, I was bummed at first, but then I learned that it’s all about compromise so I (and Slade) gave up some stuff like the opening of the comic to make sure we got the ending we wanted. In the end I know we got the best movie we could. There were a couple producers, one in particular, who wanted to change everything. I know you didn’t like the movie, but believe me, it took a lot of fighting to get what was up there.

OWAW: With all of the sequels and continuations, did you ever reach a point where you just wanted to put an end to the 30 Days story?

SN: I know the ending but I doubt I’ll ever reach it. In my mind the first three books 30 Days, Dark days and Return to Barrow are main stories. After that it’s more like the 30 Days soap opera which can go on forever as long as the excitement is there.

OWAW: How did Simon Dark come about?

SN: DC asked if I wanted to create something and I did. I came up with this weird Franken-kid who doesn’t have a clue who he is and lives in Gotham.

OWAW: Where did you get the idea for Simon Dark’s interesting look?

SN: The main sources were masked used to buffer the pian of burn victims. Everything else Scott came up with.

OWAW: As an old school Batman fan I must know, With Simon Dark existing in Gotham City, will he ever cross paths with the Dark Knight?

SN: Maybe, maybe not. The only way Simon Dark can survive on the book is by sales and sales are good for Simon (great in my mind) but DC wants it to do better or Simon Dark will be canceled. I’m sure if we chucked Bats in there, we’d sell more but I want to avoid that if I can. Batman is such a strong character. He tends to take over books. I put him in a Creeper series I did and he almost took that one over.

OWAW: Top 5 Desert Island Records?

SN:

Bad Brains: First Roir Cassette/CD

Motorhead: No Sleep Till Hammersmith
Fu Manchu: In Search of
Beatles: White Album
Rolling Stones: Exile on Main Street

OWAW: The debate rages over paper comics vs online comics, where do you fall on the subject?

SN: I like holding a comic in my hand and I know I won’t pay to read a stinkin’ comic online, so my vote is no. Online is great for something. Reading a comic is not one of them. With that said, I’m sure we’ll wind up there because we are heading towards becoming a paperless, non-reading, illiterate society and online comics will fit right in. I hope I can have my food directly inserting into my stomach soon too. All this chewing is tiring me out.

OWAW:Name one comic book character you wish you had created.

SN: Create? Batman. Hands down.

OWAW: What titles are you reading now? Why those?

SN: Not a lot of titles I follow but I do follow creators like Charles Burns and Dan Clowes. I read anything my Mark Millar (he knows how to stir shit up) and Ed Brubaker (Best Crime Writer right now). I will also pick up the occasional Grant Morrison book.

OWAW: Tell us something about Steve Niles that would surprise people.

SN: I’ve answered this question many times before. No? Not a surprise? Okay, let me see…I’ll eat just about anything. I love Sushi and I’ll even eat the Sea Urchin.

OWAW: One literary character you’d like to have dinner with. Why?

SN: Tarzan, because he’s tear the shit out of the restaurant and I would laugh and laugh.

King Of The Jungle, table for 2---OWAW
OWAW: Are you scripting any original films? Is that something that interests you?

SN: Working on one right now. With the writers strike over I can start hitting the bricks again so I might have something to announce soon.

OWAW: People are really pissed about Marvel’s decision with Spider-Man and the whole erasing of his history. What’s your feeling on it?

SN: I feel the only way Marvel can get press is to make trouble in lieu of actually putting out good books. Spiderman unmasking, Captain America dying, now Cap with a gun, and so on. The only time we hear about Marvel is when they are “controversial”. How about just telling a good story? Marvel has some of the best talent in the industry in Bendis, Millar, Brubaker and don’t even get me started on the artists. So much great talent being used on cheap gimmicks. It’s really sad. Corporate and sad. As far as the Peter and Mary Jane thing….if you can’t tell a good story with them married, then you probably won’t be able to with them single.

OWAW: Top 5 movies of all time.

Night of the Living Dead

The Exorcist
The Thing (both)
Frankenstein
The Maltese Falcon.

OWAW: Name one pop culture trend you really hate!!

SN: Our steady reliance on technology.

OWAW: . Do you ever worry about being pigeon hold into horror comics?

SN: Nope. I love them.

OWAW: As somebody who’s made it, whats the best advice you can give somebody trying to make it?

SN: I always say the same thing, because it’s the only thing I did that seemed to have payed off…never give up. Just never, ever give up.

OWAW: When you pass on, what do you want your legacy to be?

SN: Even if it’s just a tiny bit, I’d like to think I had an effect on comics and horror. We’ll see. I still have a lot of time to do something crazy and blow the whole legacy thing completely.

Thanks again Steve, for everything. If you want to check out more about Steve Niles, check out his personal site.

STEVE NILES ONLINE

AQUALAD'S GREATEST SAYING (DECEMBER 8TH, 2007)

2008-10-28T19:05:00.000-07:00

One of the greatest DVD releases this year was the 2 disc set of the old Aquaman show, which aired in the 60s alongside Superman. The show was just a plain old good time. Aquaman and his trusty sidekick Aqualad patrolled the ocean and fought off bad guys. It was wonderfully animated and a lot of fun. One of my favorite things was Aqualad (voiced by Jerry Dexter) and his long list of exclamations when trouble arose. Here now, in what may be my dorkiest move ever, is a list of all those sayings:

Holy Hurricanes
Mumbling Morays
Bumbling Blowfish
Sufferin Catfish
Jumpin Jellyfish
Mumbling Mantas
Sufferin Seashells
Holy Haddock
Hopping Toadfish
Leaping Lionfish
Holy Halibut
Flappin FrostFish
Sufferin Sea Snakes
Pounding Pigfish
Bouncing Butterfish
Jumpin Jackfish
Sufferin Sunfish
Weepin Weakfish
Sputtering Spoonbills
Holy Hackfish
Leapin Lampreys
Holy Mackerel
Sufferin Seasnails
Murmuring Moonfish
Holy Hagfish
Jumpin Porcupine Fish
Wailing Woolfish
Gallopin Guppies
Slithering Seaweed
Flippin Flounders
Shivering Shellfish
Soarin Sailfish
Leapin Lonefish
Holy Hagfish
Howling Houndfish

There you have it, collect 'em, trade 'em, share 'em with your friends!!!

20 QUESTIONS WITH COREY TAYLOR (OCTOBER 12TH, 2007)

2008-10-28T19:04:00.000-07:00

Corey Taylor is a multi-tasker in the truest sense of the word. He's the frontman to two hugely successful bands: Slipknot & Stone Sour. He's a dad, a writer, a producer and a dedicated long time geek. He also happens to just be a cool fucking guy. Seriously, he was down to Earth enough to answer 20 questions for my little blog in the midst of everything in his life. So, without further ado, here's Corey Taylor:

OUR WORLDS AT WAR: How old were you when you started reading comics?

COREY TAYLOR: Really young- like 5 or 6. Mom had a stack of gnarly comics she
kept by my toy chest. They were annexed soon after.

OWAW: Who was the first comic book hero that you read?

CT: Spiderman. He is and always will be the man to me.

OWAW: What title/titles do you collect now?

CT: I collect writers more than titles anymore. Ennis, Ellis, Bendis, I
just enjoy writers. If my favorites do different titles, I'll check
them out.

OWAW: Your love of spiderman is obvious, what is it about him you love so
much?

CT: I love the fact that he eats shit on an almost constant basis, and
yet he still gets up and does what he thinks is right, no matter what.
His convictions are as strong as his powers. We damn near grew up
together and that is something I love as well.

OWAW: Who are your top 3 comic book artists?

CT: Artists would be Glenn Fabry, Alex Ross and John Romita Jr.

OWAW: Do you have a rare comic or one with sentimental value? What is it?

CT: Like everyone else, I went through my madness of collecting every
CHAOS variant that they gave us, so I have a lot of chromium covers
floating around. I also have Venom #1 which was printed on regular
paper- super rare.

OWAW: What's your opinion on comic book movies?

CT: I can go either way, really. They've gotten better. Technology has
unfortunately made it impossible for us to tell a bad movie from a
good one anymore- they all LOOK great. But I've seen the original FF4
movie- the one that was so bad it was banned from VHS. So I have hope.

OWAW: What's your opinion on Robert Downey JR as iron man?

CT:Three words: FUCKING LOVE IT.

OWAW: Heath Ledger as The Joker?

CT: Three more words: DROOLING ON KEYBOARD.

OWAW: To me most new horror movies suck. What do you think?

CT:I would have to agree. Most are formulaic AT BEST. But I can be
pleasantly surprised. Then again, we always tend to disagree, right? I
mean, I LOVED Halloween.

OWAW:: You have a lot to do with your videos and the artistic look of
Slipknot. Would you ever direct for a living? Would you do a horror
remake, if so which one and why

CT: I don't know. I would love to direct a movie, but I get stressed
producing albums, I would probably destroy people directing a movie.
Remake? Horror movie? YENTL.

OWAW: Everything is an action figure now, do you think that's a good or
bad thing.

CT: That's hard for me being an action figure whore. But I can
definitely say the world did NOT need three variant Jesus Christ
action figures.

OWAW: How much shit do you have?

CT: I have 25 large moving boxes full of figures that I started
collecting in '90. I have a lot of stuff.

OWAW: Are you part of the tech geek scene (ipods, digital cameras, etc)?

CT: Not really. I love my iPod, but that's where I peak.

OWAW: Do you think Hi-Def dvds are the wave of the future or just a
gimmick. Does it really make a difference.

CT: Better not be- I have over 3000 DVDs. It's like we never learned
our lesson from Betamax...

OWAW: Do you watch any fantasy tv: Supernatural, Heroes, Smallville
etc...

CT: HEROES is excellent. I'd even count LOST in that, which is one of
my favorites. But I haven't been the same since FIREFLY was cancelled.

OWAW: Its really hip and cool now to be seen as a "geek", do you think
that sucks as much as I do.

CT: Yeah. I guarantee these people would change their tune if they
were called that in fucking high school. Whatever- fads come and go. I
mean, shit- I wore JNCO pants once.

OWAW: Are you part of the video game revolution? If so what games do you
play?

CT: I detest a lot of video games. But I am just addicted to Tiger
Woods. Absolutely rules.

OWAW:Top 5 favorites movies and least favorite movies.

CT: Top 5: From Dusk Till Dawn, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, Empire
Strikes Back, Escape From New York and Braveheart. Least 5: Queen of
the Damned (fucking joke), Thin Red Line (three hours of bullshit),
Wyatt Earp (three MORE hours of bullshit), Blair Witch 2 (Jesus...)
and Judge Dread (nuff said).

OWAW: Would you ever write or draw your own comic? Does that interest
you?

CT: Naw. I'm too big a fan. I wouldn't know where to start.

Thanks Corey!! You can catch Corey on the new Stone Sour album Come What (ever) May which is out now!!

And I hear rumor there may be a new Slipknot album in the future.

Later
Iann

20 QUESTIONS WITH PETER BAGGE (OCTOBER 10TH, 2007)

2008-10-28T19:03:00.000-07:00

Peter Bagge is a legend in his own time, at least to those of us who love art, comics and the idea of doing what you want, when you want and making it work. Mr. Bagge is the creator of Hate Comics amongst other titles and has been blazing a trail through the underground since the early eighties. His cynical format and real life prose came to the light of the mainstream during the early to mid-nineties and has never seemed to leave. With a constant drive to re-invent himself and his art Peter Bagge constantly challenges the art world, the comic audience and the perceptions of what can be done. I sent a request to many comic writers about doing an interview for my tiny blog; Mr. Bagge was the only one who responded. Here are his 20 Questions!!

OWAW: So fill me in on Apocalypse Nerd

PETER BAGGE: The Dark Horse website will describe it as well if not better than I can, but in a nutshell: It's about a nerd who survives a nuclear attack and tries to survive in the woods on his own.

OWAW: Do you prefer doing min-series or monthly?

PB: It doesn't matter, really. It depends on the material. Besides, they're ALL mini-series eventually, ha ha!

OWAW: When you draw do you have music playing or something going on in the background?

PB: Music, no, never. Too distracting. When I'm writing I need total silence. When I ink I occasionally listen to talk radio or a ball game.

OWAW: Do you think the current rush towards comic books from Hollywood will help or hinder the comic world?

PB: I think the attention is good, as long as everyone doesn't assume they're making a potential movie that's simply starting it's live as a comic book. But as long as people still do good work it doesn't matter.

OWAW: What happened to the Hate Comic TV show/Movie?

PB: The possibility is always there, since it's forever being optioned and occasionally is "in development." I think it most likely will never happen.

OWAW: You, Dave Sim, Crumb, Spain, and others have made a comfortable living doing your own comics, do you think that’s still possible or is the market too flooded?

PB: Of course it's possible! You named 3 people who are older than me, but I know plenty of younger artists who've made much better money than I have off of their comics. You just have to work hard and find a niche, is all.

OWAW: Are you part of the technology revolution that seems to be sweeping the nation?

PB: Meaning do I own a computer? Yes.

OWAW: When you do album covers do you always like the bands you do them for?

PB: I wish! I usually like them to some degree, but only garage/grunge/punk bands hire me to do their covers, while my taste is more pop-ish.

OWAW: Do you think that some of the elitism that springs from the underground comics movement keeps people for learning about and enjoying them?

PB: I wouldn't call it elitism so much as too self-involved. The whole scene is a bit too much of a circle jerk at times.

OWAW: The last movie you saw that you really liked? Why?

PB: The last movie I saw in a theater was "Superbad." I liked it because it was funny.

OWAW: Is it weird to still be active in the medium but already have a “Retrospective” book?

PB: You mean like such books should only be written about the retired or the dead? Hmmm. Now I feel ancient!

OWAW: Any idea when Marvel might release the Hulk satire you did?

PB: No, but my hunch is never.

OWAW: The character of Lisa, is that based on anybody you know? An amalgam of people or just totally made up?

PB:A mix of folks, though mainly 3 or four different friends of mine from the past.

OWAW: Last record you bought, why you bought it and your favorite musical genre.

PB: I just ordered some Greatest Hits collections of various pop acts from the late 60s: The Cowsills, Spanky and Our Gang and The Fifth Dimension. I bought 45s by all those bands when I was a kid, but have since lost them all. The older I get, the more stuck in my own past I get, musically speaking.

OWAW: If you could fistfight one comic book hero (and it would be evenly matched) who would it be? Why that one?

PB: By "hero" do you mean superheroes? I never was a fan of any of that stuff, so rather than have a fistfight with anyone of them I'd rather just drop a nuke on ALL of them.

OWAW: Do you ever get shit for being “too negative”?

PB: I used to, and deservedly so! These days I get an occasional angry letter over something I've written for Reason Magazine, but in most cases the person misinterpreted something I wrote.

OWAW: A lot of the art and music that rose up in the late eighties through the mid nineties has faded out or died altogether. Why do you think your stuff continues to find an audience?

PB: You mean the grunge stuff? My work sold as well before that stuff came out as it did during it's heyday and afterwards, so we weren't exactly attached at the hip.

OWAW: Do you prefer writing & drawing? Just drawing? Just writing?

PB: Writing. It's a cakewalk compared to drawing.

OWAW: Any chance of a collection book for the Bat Boy stuff?

PB: Well, it's all being collected in HATE ANNUAL, albeit in 3 installments. If it ever comes out as its own book it'll be awhile.

OWAW: Do you collect comics? Anything in your collection that is particularly special to you?

PB: I'm not much of a completist. I just buy what I like. As for "special": maybe a handful of titles that I really flipped over, like early Crumb comics.

Thanks so much Mr. Bagge, you've been a great help in launching this aspect of the Our Worlds At War blog. For those of you who want to learn more about Peter Bagge and his art you can check out his website here:

http://www.peterbagge.com/

A NEW DAWN IN ADVERTISING, THAT'S WHAT WE NEED. (OCTOBER 4TH, 2007)

2008-10-28T18:57:00.000-07:00

The other night I was watching TV and I saw what I believe to be the pinnacle of how awful the advertising industry has become. Here, let me paint a picture for you:

It's late night, some Urban sprawl somewhere, Cool City USA we can call it. Bright lights, people around, etc. From out of nowhere zooms this red Cadillac car, passing all the traffic with ease. CUT TO: The driver, who oozes and oozes cunt. I mean he just drips with shitbag cuntidice. Imagine the bastard child of the dickwad from Maroon 5, Vin Diesel and Gordon Gekko from Wall Street. He's in a cool suit, with this look of "Yeah, I'm the shit." on his face and proceeds to say this: "You can work to fit in, you can aspire to blend into the background. You can work, dress and drive Urban Camouflage!! You can live by the idea that the nail that sticks up gets hammered down or (he shifts into HIGH GEAR) You can BE the hammer!!" CUT TO: The outside as the car goes EVEN FASTER down the streets of Cool City USA. When the commercial ended all I could think was...

IT'S JUST A CAR.

That's it; it's a fucking car.

It's not a tool in a revolution, it's not the means to take drastic action in a world of mediocrity, it’s a fucking car, and an ugly car to boot. I just don't get advertising, it makes no fucking sense to me. They're all panicking because TV advertising dollars are down, advertising people are the soulless, bloodless, remains of a hedonistic society on the brink of destruction and yet they still are trying to sell people this dreck. Nobody sells the product anymore, most likely because the product sucks, so instead, they sell a lifestyle. You don't buy a car; you buy the cool life the cunt behind the wheel is selling. You don't buy clothes; you buy the lifestyle that dressing like this is supposed to afford you. Does that shit work? Are people's lives so fucking bankrupt that they believe shiny toys, new duds or some kind of electronic home theater system is the answer?

You even see this shit in an Applebee’s commercial. These young cool kids are sitting around laughing like they just smoked a big bag of skunk, feeding each other, cracking jokes and just rocking out to the greatest party ever. That's bullshit, you ever been to an Applebees? It's crying children, depressed old people and folks counting out change to cover their meal. Same thing with Olive Garden, it's not a big family reunion housed in a restaurant, it's mothers and fathers trying desperately to pretend this is a "quality evening out" because they have no money in Bush Era economics to feed their families, pay their bills and then have any kind of life. Those places are depressing but according to the commercials it is THE PARTY PLACE!!!

On the flipside of that you then try and get people who want to raise advertising to...cough cough vomit vomit...ART!! They try to make these either sardonic, wacky commercials or they pretend to try and be abstract. The two best forms of this are the "Office" inspired commercials and the Sprite commercials. The Office inspired commercials (inspired by the show The Office) has really been beaten to death lately. They take the normal everyday office life and try to elevate it to something wacky, or ironically dry. It tries to be artistic but usually gets annoying. Like the current commercial where the guy brings an IV to the office because he's "tired" of eating boring food. His Co-worker, confounded by the craziness of this, introduces him to Quiznos. WOW, that's funny, that's ironic, WHERE THE FUCK IS THE QUIZNOS...LETS EAT!!!

The worst of the lot is the attempts to make advertising art and the one that really grinds my patience into dust is the Sprite commercials where they try to use fast moving images to tell you about Lymon. The whole thing is a rush of images trying to be artsy. Two miniature Japanese women use a yellow/green (lemon/lime=lymon) heart machine to "shock" this full-sized woman awake with the lymon shocker. Then you have two sumo wrestlers, one painted yellow, the other green and they run full speed into this kid and he acts all "refreshed" blah blah blah. It's annoying because while they are standing around, patting themselves on the back on their artistic merits, they are still just hawking soda.

I know the next argument to come out of the Demon Brood Of Advertisers is "Yeah..well...you remembered our commercial and our product." Yes, that may be true but not in the way they want. 90% of all the humans I've ever talked to are inspired to not buy shit because the commercials suck. I wouldn't drink Sprite simply because it tries to sell me rebellion by screaming "Obey Your Thirst". I would rather blow up a Cadillac dealership than buy one since I saw that ad so these folks are missing the mark.

Thankfully, I have the answer.

It's time for a new dawn in advertising, time to really walk to the beat of a new drummer. Advertising should be split into two sections: True Advertising and Truly Bizarre Advertising. Statistics show us that people are not really motivated to "buy" products by advertising, the best that it can do is spark an interest. That being said, lets really spark some interest by leaving people scratching their heads. Here's what I mean:

FADE IN: Four stray dogs are eating out of a trashcan. They're barking, playing, eating, etc. Suddenly one dog looks up, looks at the other dogs and starts running. He runs through the streets of a city, through out its ally ways, past stores, etc. The dog gets to a wood shop and runs super fast, leaps and throws itself into a wood chipper. FADE IN: BUY KODAK.

FADE IN: A man is driving home, his car stops on a train track. The train hits the back of his car and the car spins and spins for 20 seconds, while the guy is screaming his nuts off. Finally the car stops, the guy breathes for a second and then lowers his head and starts crying. FADE UP: KRAFT MACARONI AND CHEESE

FADE IN: A pretty girl on the toilet, she's groaning, moaning, and really having a hard time passing this crap. We see her from all angles trying to force it out. Then, her face lifts, we hear a plop sound and she starts to breathe easier. PRUDENTIAL LIFE INSURANCE

FADE IN: A man, bloody, running for his life with a crazed look in his eyes. Behind him, ten rabbits with demon eyes and blood on their fur are giving chase. He leaps, ducks, bounds but finally trips. The man grabs a sharp stick and turns to face them, the rabbits have cornered him, and they’re making an awful sound. The man raises the stick and the charge at each other screaming. FADE IN: TAMPAX MAXI-PADS

There have been a few commercials that have nailed this idea of true abstract vision. The best one to date is the orange juice commercial with Robert Loggia in it. Here it is, check out what I mean:

See, that makes me want to buy minute maid RIGHT AWAY!!! So you can hit the public up with that kind of shit and then later hit them with the other side, the straight ad. Show a car; tell us what it does, tell us the gas mileage and then the price. Show the car from different angles and then the name of the car, BOOM that’s it. Same with stuff like coffee have a guy tell how much he loves coffee and how he needs it for his day and then why he likes whatever brand you're hawking. It's honest, to the point and the actual product doesn't get lost in the shuffle of the commercial itself.

Advertising is never going away, ever. So if it's not then lets make it really fun and really honest. No more shitcunts driving cars trying to sell the idea that you'll be forwarding independent thought by purchasing a Caddy. That's just stupid and insulting to the people who watch.

That's what I think anyway.

Iann

MY TOP 50 FANTASY DVDS (JUNE 28TH, 2007)

2008-10-28T18:52:00.000-07:00

So after doing that whole thing on those 3 overlooked Fantasy DVDS, I decided to expand things a bit and give those who don't know a top 50 list of fantasy movies just in case they want to check them out. I've also put a small overview of each film and my mini-review with it so you can figure out if you have any interest in these movies. Some of you might disagree with these choices, saying they're more sci-fi or action or whatever but to me each of these movies has the intangible thing that makes it a fantasy film. Now remember, these are MY CHOICES, your ideas might differ whole heartedly or not at all, the best thing that can come of this is people discussing great fantasy movies. For instance, I didn't like the film MirrorMask, but there are those out there who worship it and now my simple revelation will hopefully spark a discussion. So, without further ado, here we go!!

50. WILLOW (1988): Ok, I'm not a gigantic fan of this movie but I do count it as one of the must have/see films on any fantasy list. Willow tells the story of a reluctant hero dwarf who must protect a special child from the clutches of an evil Queen. Good effects, a nice story and some great fantasy elements keep this film moving along, it just never struck the same chord with me that Dragonslayer or Dark Crystal did.

49. FIRE & ICE (1983): This is one of the many great films from underrated animation genius Ralph Bakshi. The story here is a tense battle between good and evil waged upon a surging glacier which serves as a kingdom for the evil Lord Nekron. Only our hero Larn can help the good king Jarol of the Fire Keep in his battle against Nekron. Amazing animation, a great story and kick ass action make this one of Bakshi's best.

48. TOYS (1992): Man, people HATED this movie, HATED IT!! I don't understand why and I never will. Is it an amazing film, no, but it's harmless and sweet and visually stunning. A seriously nutbag military general inherits a toy company and starts making war toys. The family that is left behind bands together to stop him. Robin Williams gives a subdued performance and the supporting cast are wonderful. This is a movie that has massive holes in it but I still enjoyed it and man---WOW---what a visual trip!!

47. LADYHAWKE (1985): Give me just about any movie with Rutgar Haur and I am signed right up. Now add to it a great fantasy yarn about two cursed lovers, the man (Haur) must be a wolf at night, the lady (Michelle Pfeiffer) a hawk during the day, sprinkle in a sarcastic young escaped thief (Matthew Broderick) and a non-stop adventure to kill the evil king that has cursed them and you have a classic on your hands!!

46. E.T.(1982): Yeah, ok, call me sentimental but I don't know one person my age that, when this movie first came out, didn't wish they could've met ET themselves. This was a great fantasy tale about a friendless boy who meets a lost alien and how their friendship is what they must count on to get the alien home. I didn't buy into the massive media blitz but the movie itself is gem!!

45. DEATHRACE 2000: Are you kidding me!? A fantasy/sci-fi tale about a car race where pedestrians are run down for points!? Included in this fucked up fantasy masterpiece are David Carradine and Sylvester Stallone? SIGN ME UP!! It's dumb and silly but it kicks major major ass!!

44. SWORD & THE SORCERER (1981): A mercenary with a three-bladed sword rediscovers his royal heritage dangerous future when he is recruited to help a princess foil the designs of a brutal tyrant and a powerful sorcerer in conquering a land. This is another of those great 80s fantasy movies. Not super high budget but a really cool looking film with some great moments!!

43. LEGEND (1985): This may be the only movie I liked Tom Cruise in and man is it a visual stunner!! The plot is pretty simple: A young man must stop the Lord of Darkness from both destroying daylight and marrying the woman he loves, but it plays out with such action and style that you can't help but get sucked in. I also dare anybody to find a cooler looking Lord Of Darkness!!

42. THE LOST WORLD (1925): Some say this is one of the films that started special effects movies and fantasy films. This is a great stop-motion animation film about a land where dinosaurs still roam and the people who get trapped there. It has all the charm of a film from that era and some pretty great effects to. A serious classic.

41. THX-1138 (1971): It's sad, you look at this brilliant film and then you look at the new Star Wars movies and you just wonder what the fuck happened to George Lucas. THX-1138 is a wonderfully acted and directed film about a man who rebels against his rigidly controlled society and tries to break out. It's stark, depressing and a really wonderful look at how the future looks with no free will!!

40. SOMETHING WICKED THIS WAY COMES (1983): A lot of folks hate this movie and I confess it is not anywhere near as good as the Ray Bradbury novel its taken from. That being said, it is a damn fine fantasy movie with some great performances and some eerie settings. The story revolves around a diabolical circus that comes to town and preys on the townsfolk. Is it as weighty and filled with glory as the novel--no. Is it a really good film, I think so!!

39. SLAUGHTERHOUSE 5 (1972): Trying to explain how brilliant this film is would be like dancing about architecture--just silly. Make sure you see this movie before you die, end of story, nothing else needed to be said.

38. WIZARD OF OZ (1939): This is another movie that belongs up there as one of the very first fantasy films. For those who don't know the story--if there are any--I'll sum it up. Young Dorothy longs to be off her Kansas farm and one day a tornado comes and takes her to the land of Oz. In order to get back home she must see the Wizard Of Oz and defeat the evil Witch. Along the way she meets the Scarecrow, The Cowardly Lion and The Tin Man. Great musical numbers, awesome characters and a whole lot of fun is in store for anybody who views this magnificent film!!

37. GOJIRA (1954): This was the classic that started it all, the original Godzilla movie. Nuclear testing has brought to life a monster that is unstoppable and headed for Tokyo. There were many other films, many of them wonderful but this is the original man-in-suit film that gave birth to the phenomenon known as Godzilla.

36. WIZARDS (1977): Another Ralph Bakshi classic animated fantasy movie!! In a post apocalyptic Earth, a good Wizard does battle with an evil Wizard who uses technology for his sinister purposes. This movie is fucked up to watch but so so good!! Proof that Bakshi's "Animation For Adults" idea really works.

35. PLANET OF THE APES (1968): This movie is a classic fantasy tale for several reasons. First off, what a great concept, in a post apocalyptic Earth, apes have become hyper-intelligent and they run shit now. Man is the beast and all is right with the world. That is until Charlton Heston and his fellow astronauts--thrown off course and forward in time--crash land and set the whole place on its ear. Make sure you check out the awesome speech one of the good apes gives about man--classic stuff!!

34. QUEST FOR FIRE (1981): This one is a serious milestone in how great movie making can have no words in it at all. Quest For Fire is a fantasy film set in the prehistoric times of the first man. Their tribe runs out of fire and the leaders must go in search of it. What transpires is an amazing film about survival and man battling nature, all done with no dialogue. It's hard to describe how good this movie is, you must see it for yourself.

33. ROCKETEER (1991): Oddly enough this fantasy/superhero movie, that was released in the early 90s, is the one the least amount of people have heard of. It's not for lack of trying, the cast in this movie contains Alan Arkin, Terry O'Quinn, Paul Sorvino, Jennifer Connelly, and Timothy Dalton. It's based on a kick ass series of comic books and has a story that not only holds an adult's interest but can entertain the kids to. The plot revolves around a young test pilot who's having a hard-time figuring his life out. His girlfriend (Connelly) is tired of his games, the stunt show he does with his friend (Arkin) is falling apart and just when it can't get worse he finds jet-pack and helmet that have been stolen and are now being pursued by the mob, the government and the Nazis. Donning the helmet and jet-pack he becomes the Rocketeer and does good deeds while trying to battle those who want him dead so they can have the jet-pack for themselves.

32. MOTORAMA (1991): This is the story of a boy who is trying to win a gas station game by spelling out the word Motorama. If he does he will win millions. I know this doesn't seem like a fantasy movie but trust me, it is. It's so bizarre it couldn't be anything but a fantasy film.

31. KRULL (1983): Sure, this is a big rip off of Star Wars and true it was made during the rush of fantasy films that blurted out in the eighties but it still kicks major ass. The basic story is a of a Prince who sets out to rescue his princess from alien invaders using an ancient weapon that is basically a glorified Ninja Star. The effects aren't great but this movie is a whole hell of a lot of fun!!

30. FLASH GORDON (1980): Ok, this isn't the old time serial but as far as movie interpretations go, this is a lot of fun!! Basically Flash Gordon (a football player) accidentally ends up in a spaceship with a brilliant scientist and a girl reporter. They land on planet Mongo where they face Ming The Merciless who is out to destroy the Earth. No, the acting isn't great but the costumes and sets are gorgeous and really different. You can't beat Max Von Sydow as Ming nor the appearance of a very young Timothy Dalton. The scene where Flash uses his football know how to fight Ming's guards is still classic and--above all else--QUEEN DOES THE MUSIC!!!!! I don't care who you are, this movie will rock you!!

29. HEAVY METAL (1981): This is Ralph Bakshi's shining moment in animation. Heavy Metal combines rock and fantasy to create several stories centering around a girl being terrorized by an orb. The stories range from Barbarian tales to a futuristic trial starring the legendary Hanover Fisk!! With animation that still holds up today as well as songs by Dio, Devo, Deep Purple and Black Sabbath among others, Heavy Metal kicks major major ass!!

28. 7TH VOYAGE OF SINBAD (1958): This is a super Ray Harryhausen treat. Sinbad's queen is shrunken by an evil wizard and Sinbad must duel monsters and the sea in order to save her and stop a war. Along the way Harryhausen slaps us around with a skeleton king, a cyclops a blue dragon and all kinds of stop motion joy!! Contains all the charm of a 1958 fantasy movie, which I find lacking today and it's just a good time for the whole family!!

27. PANS LABYRINTH (2007): Much like City Of Lost Children, Pans Labyrinth is an adult fantasy and a real mind fuck. The story revolves around a little girl who escapes being the stepdaughter of a fascist dictator in Spain circa 1944 by throwing herself into a fantasy world. During her visit she is given a quest and her world begins to fall apart. This movie is another gem from director Guillermo Del Toro who brought us wonderful movies like Devil's Backbone and Hellboy. The film is beautiful to look at and captivating to involve yourself in. Not very many modern films tap into the joy of good fantasy but this one does in a wonderful way.

26. TIME BANDITS (1981): Saying a film directed by Terry Gilliam (Monty Python) is really weird is like saying a film by Eli Roth is really bad...it goes without saying. However, Gilliam did manage to reign in some of the weirdness to make a truly original fantasy tale of a group of little people who started out helping "God" or whatever you want to call it, create and maintain the world. They decide to steal a map from him of all the holes in time where they can jump from era to era and steal great treasures. Along the way they enlist the help of a neglected english boy and anger the evil wizard Evil Genius (played brilliantly by David Warner). This is a nice mix of fantasy, comedy, and general weirdness. It also manages to make a statement about the state of the world and organized religion as a whole.

25. MONSTER SQUAD (1987): Seriously, how do you get better than a film about old school monsters coming to life to try and take over the world? Involve a group of rambunctious kids who are forced to fight this evil presence and you have Monster Squad a kick ass "kids" movie that still can hold an adults attention. Sure some of it is kid-silly but who cares, it's a a great movie with a lot of charm and fun.

24. NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS (1993): I dug a lot of Tim Burton's early work, Edward Scissorhands, Pee Wee's Big Adventure and so on. As time wore on he became less of a director and more of a style-guide and his stuff resonated with me a lot less. That being said, Nightmare Before Christmas is a fucking crucial fantasy film for everybody. This is the story of Jack Skelington, the king of Halloween Town who longs for more than just trickery and ghouls. When Jack stumbles into Christmas Land and decides he should take over the results are disastrous. This movie has wonderful characters, breathtaking animation and is just an all around solid piece of filmmaking!!

23. THE TIME MACHINE (1960): There have been many TV versions of this film and a really bad take on it for the big screen in 2002 but NOTHING comes close to the original. Based on an amazing book by HG Wells, this tells the story of George Wells an inventor who creates a time machine in order to move into a time when humans are at peace. Sadly he discovers humans don't stop fighting until they have paid the ultimate price. After that, they are split into two camps, the humans and the mutants. This is a wonderful story, beautifully brought to life in a very 60s technicolor way. If you like fantasy mixed with a bit of science and some action, this is a movie for you!!

22. WAR OF THE WORLDS (1953): I was a huge fan of this HG Wells classic novel and a huge fan of Orson Wells radio broadcast of it and I way HATED the film re-make with Tom Cruise and that's because it lacked the charm of the original. Perhaps I'm just nostalgic or too old but the way this 1953 movie tells the tale of martians invading Earth and the havoc they wreak is impossible to top. I think this stuck much more to the spirit of the book (though it also took some liberties) and that may be why I love it so much. As the 1980s were a key time for fantasy, the 50s were a great time for sci-fi/fantasy films. As many as there were, only War Of The Worlds and a few others managed to bridge the worlds of fantasy and sci-fi. This is a classic!!

21. LABYRINTH (1986): Ok, I know the argument has waged over which is the better Jim Henson movie: Labyrinth or Dark Crystal and even though I must side on the Dark Crystal team, I really dug the charm of Labryinth. Here a very young Jennifer Connelly, who is obsessed with fantasy stories, is forced to babysit her brother. She wishes the Goblin King would come and take him away and then--well--he does. Connelly sets out on a quest through the epic Labyrinth which surrounds the Goblin King's castle where the baby is kept. Lots of good fun, Jim Henson creatures and good times had by all. I also remember being 15 years old and wanting more than anything to meet a girl who looked like Connelly that was into this kind of stuff. I would've had an easier time trying to find the Holy Grail (and sadly that is still true). Another bonus is the Goblin King is played by David Bowie, which rocks. Not a huge fan of the musical numbers but I still loved the movie.

20. CITY OF LOST CHILDREN (1995): Originally released as Le Cité Des Enfants Perdus, this french film is classic fantasy tale and a total mindfuck!! Imagine something as odd and visually stunning as Brazil but fantasy instead of violent futuristic movie. The story is simple and wonderful, in a surrealistic city a scientist is kidnapping children and stealing their dreams in order to slow his aging process. Lavishly shot with sets and costumes and visuals that are rivaled by no other film. City Of Lost Children is purely and simply a fantasy epic that will warp your imagination. I highly recommend watching it high!!

19. LORD OF THE RINGS TRILOGY (2001-2003): I put this trilogy here because it must be given the respect it deserves for bringing to life a series of books that are intrinsic to any fantasy lovers life. All three of these films are equal in their greatness and equal in their problems, which mainly come from length. Don't get me wrong, I loved these movies. Director Peter Jackson and the cast show that you can make a special effects movie with heart, great acting and even soul. With all that going for it, I don't watch them very often because it's 12 hours of my life I just can't give up.

18. 20,000 LEAGUES UNDER THE SEA (1954): I know there have been several movie and TV versions of this film but for my money this the best one. Starring Kirk Douglas and James Mason, this is the classic story of a ship being sent to investigate a rash of ships sinking only to met up by Captain Nemo and his amazing submarine the Nautilus. Everything is in here, ships, the sea, swashbuckling, a bit of sci-fi and a fight with a giant squid!! The other versions of this film have either not had the effects to tell the story, relied too much on effects or tried to mess with the original book plot. The 1954 version stays true to the original idea and ramps up the adventure!!

17. PRINCESS BRIDE (1987): It is very rare when a fantasy movie comes along that is as much for girls as it is for guys. A film that can hold the attention of both with a combination of adventure and romance. Even more difficult is to have the romance mean something to the men who watch it without it seeming like a "chick flick". Princess Bride does that in spades with the story of Wesley, his true love Buttercup and the twisting, winding and brilliant adventure they must undergo before being together. This isn't just a classic fantasy movie, this is a classic movie!!!

16. THE NEVERENDING STORY (1984): When I was a kid this was one of the holy pillars of all fantasy films. Well, seriously, how could it not be. The film focuses in on a boy who loves fantasy, reading, etc and has no friends and ends up finding a purpose and good friends within the pages of a book that is actually a living breathing world. Within the book we get to meet Falcor the giant dragon dog, not to mention the evil wolf, a force called the nothing and the giant rock that eats limestone. Director Wolfgang Peterson has crafted a movie so wonderful that not only does it stand the test of time but it also withstands the crappy sequel and other stuff they've done to try and make a buck off of it.

15. THE IRON GIANT(1999): It may feature the voice of Vin Diesel but this movie is still a winner. The plot, animation and vibe of this movie is a total throwback to the Golden Age of comics. In the film, a boy makes friends with an innocent alien giant robot that a paranoid government agent wants to destroy. The Iron Giant only wants to make friends but paranoia and hostility make people afraid, leading to sad actions on their part. This is a top quality animated fantasy adventure that is good for the kids and totally entertaining for adults.

14. WILLY WONKA AND CHOCOLATE FACTORY (1971): Most of the world probably now only knows this tale by the abysmal "re-imagining" that Tim Burton did with Johnny Depp but ask anybody who knows their shit and they will tell you that this 1971 classic starring Gene Wilder is THE ONE AND ONLY!!! Wilder is Willy Wonka, the owner of the biggest candy empire in the world and a total recluse and enigma. Through a contest featuring those ever elusive Golden Tickets, 5 kids are chosen to step foot into the chocolate factory to see what goes on. One of them is the golden hearted Charlie and we get to watch the experience through his eyes. Wilder is BRILLIANT as Willy Wonka, he owns this role and the film itself is acerbically funny with lovely musical numbers and amazing characters. A must!!

13. JASON AND THE ARGONAUTS (1963): Yep, this is another super fucking awesome Ray Harryhausen movie that I spent many an afternoon in my local theater watching with Sinbad and Robinson Crusoe. The film centers on Greek legend Jason gathering his band of merry adventurers in the search for the magical Golden Fleece. Along the way they fight against many amazing creatures, the least of which is NOT the army of skeletons. A straight out fantasy adventure movie that kicks much ass!!

12. KING KONG (1933 & 2005): I know a lot of people will want to chop my head off for including the newest re-make of King Kong alongside the classic original but--y'know what---fuck off, this is my list!!! For those of you who live in a cave with your fingers in your ears and your eyes closed, King Kong is the story of a failed movie director who drags a wary crew and a beautiful young woman to an uncharted island to shoot his movie. When they get there they meet Kong, the 30 foot gorilla that falls in love with the young woman and then gets captured and dragged to NYC. You can't FUCK at all with the classic, it is the epitome of the straight ahead good time fantasy adventure movie. The effects are staggering when you consider what time era they came from and the story is as original as any to come out. The 1977 remake just sucked, monkey sucked, plot sucked, dialogue sucked it just sucked. However, the 2005 version, for all its flaws, was a wonderful movie that I own and watch repeatedly. True its too long but director Peter Jackson really flushes out the human characters as well as Kong, making him more than just a monster.

11. TRON (1982): This movie was way ahead of its time and is one of my favorites to this day. This tells the story of a man trying to hack into a computer system to find proof that his game ideas were stolen. Instead he is zapped into the world of the computer, where programs come to life and are forced to play videos games in order to keep from being erased. One of the best is TRON a security program that is an unstoppable force for good against the supercomputer. Visually this movie is still not to be fucked with and Jeff Bridges is awesome as the affable computer expert. You just don't get better than the light cycles, you just don't.

10. BLADE RUNNER (1982): There is always the argument being made that this movie version of Philip K. Dick's novel "Do Androids Dream Of Electric Sheep" isn't up to snuff but I think that's a bogus claim. It's very different than the book but it still kicks ass as a fantasy/sci-fi movie. The basic plot revolves around a Blade Runner: a semi-cop who's trained to take out rogue androids. 4 murdering androids have escaped, gone on a killing spree and returned to Earth seeking their maker. Harrison Ford kicks major ass as the Blade Runner and visually there are few films that can top it, even in todays world of computer graphics.

9. EXCALIBUR (1981): This is by far the most brutal and violent telling of the King Arthur myth and, to me, the best one ever. Starting from Merlin helping a King to be with his rivals wife, through Arthur removing Excalibur the sword from the stone, to Arthur becoming King, his meeting Lancelot, the fall of Camelot and the search for the Holy Grail, this movie covers it all. It also does it with bloodthirsty violence that seems more fitting of the times than a lot of the other pat versions of this story. A must see for any fantasy lover.

8. CONAN THE BARBARIAN (1982): I doubt anybody watching this movie would have thought Conan would end up as Governor of California but hey, thats life!! This film really does a great job of bringing the character to life. Arnie makes a great Conan, big, blustering, violent and menacing. The plot revolves around Conan's quest for vengeance against those who killed his parents. The movie must be seen for the opening sequence alone where a young Conan is taught about the "Secret Of Steel".

7. SUPERMAN I & II (1978, 1980): As most comic book movies continue to fail miserably on every level, these two films consistently stay wonderful viewing after viewing. Superman explains to us the arrival on Earth of Kal-El, his growth to Superman and a battle against Lex Luthor, Superman II continues the story as the Man Of Steel fights 3 supervillains from his home world. The reason these movies work is that they don't try to be jaded or hip, they bring in an innocent fantasy element that is desperately needed in comic book movies. Christopher Reeve IS Superman, and he always will be!!

6. CLASH OF THE TITANS (1981): This is THE penultimate Ray Harryhausen movie!! That being said there are a lot of people who have heard of COTT and not seen it or never even heard of it. The cast is a lot more star powered than Dragonslayer, including Burgess Meredith, Harry Hamlin, Laurence Oliver, etc. This is the ancient story of Persius (Hamlin), the son of Zeus (Oliver) who falls in love with the cursed princess Andromeda. Once Persius breaks the curse he thinks he's home free until one of the Gods piss on his parade by saying Andromeda must be sacrificed to the almighty Kraken!! Perisus sets out to find the head of Medusa, the only thing powerful enough to kill the Kraken and save his princess. PRETTY FUCKING COOL STUFF HUH!!!

5. DRAGONSLAYER (1981): When I saw this film at the ripe old age of 10 I instantly thought it was the greatest movie ever made or ever would be made. There are no stars in this film (though the main character did go on to be on Ally Mcbeal and now is on Numbers) but that actually helps it out. Here's the breakdown, an ancient and pissed off Dragon is terrorizing this town. Every six months a woman is chosen to be sacrificed to the Dragon so it won't burn the town up. Tiring of these atrocities, some of the villagers travel to the home of the great Wizard Ulrich (played by the awesome Sir Ralph Richardson). Ulrich resides quietly with his apprentice Galen and their servant. Ulrich decides to help the town but suddenly appears the King's soldiers who don't want any trouble stirred up with the Dragon and don't believe in magic anyway. Through a series of events Ulrich is killed and it's up to the magic-green Galen to try and battle the dragon. A winner for both kids and adults.

4. DARK CRYSTAL (1982): This is still one of my favorite films of all time and the best Jim Henson movie ever made. The story revolves around a shattered Crystal, a race of kindly old wizards and some evil tyrants called Skekses. The creatures in this film are some of the most imaginative in film history. From the mindless Garthin to the loyal Landstriders, this is a fully realized and rich world. It has been 1000 years since the Crystal was shattered and the three suns will soon be touching again, if the Crystal is not repaired then the evil Skesis will rule forever. The old wizards call upon a Gelfling named Jen to fulfill his destiny and heal the Crystal. The puppetry and animation are done with such loving care here that you forget they are puppets and see only the characters themselves. A simply perfect film.

3. A NEW HOPE (1977): This was it, this was the one that touched us all and started the era of nerds and geeks that have just now inherited the Earth (well, kind of). Originally titled Star Wars this was the first in a three part story that changed filmmaking, sci-fi and fantasy movies and gave my generation our own folklore to contend with. The evil Empire, led by the Emperor and Darth Vader are about to use their ultimate weapon, The Death Star, to ensure their rule of all the galaxies. Only a small band of rebels led by Princess Leia can stop them but first the Princess must be rescued by farmboy Luke Skywalker, flying pirate Han Solo and wise old Jedi Knight Obi Wan Kenobi. You can't overstate the importance of this movie and while some may claim it is purely Sci-Fi, to me it will always be a fantasy movie. There is little true science here and almost all imagination. These movies changed my life and tons more like me!!!

2. RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK (1981): How can you ever forget the debut of one of the greatest characters in film history: Indiana Jones. This is a perfect fantasy/adventure movie--there is NOTHING wrong with it, period at all. Here Indiana is out to find the lost Ark Of The Covenant before the Naxis due. What follows is a swashbuckling YEEHAW adventure the likes of which Hollywood still can't duplicate.

1. EMPIRE STRIKES BACK (1980): Of all of the three original Star Wars movies (and to my mind those are the only three there ever WERE) this is not only the best of the three but also probably the best fantasy movie ever made. Rich not only in visuals and effects but also with character and plot--this is the benchmark by which all fantasy movies should measure themselves. Young Luke Skywalker has destroyed the Death Star but his small band of rebels are on the run from the sinister Darth Vader and the Empire. Luke finds Yoda, who continues his Jedi training, while the legendary Boba Fett helps Vader track down the Millennium Falcon. Love springs for Han and Leia and one of the greatest revelations in movie history happens in this film. The other wonderful thing is that it ends on a dark note, something very few other films would dare to do!!

So there you have it, I hope this educated some of you and helped others remember those wonderful films adulthood might have made you forget.

DC UNIVERSE ONLINE GAME PREVIEW

2008-10-28T17:51:00.000-07:00

I'M NOT A GAMER AND THIS LOOKS AWESOME!!

MY SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN TRIBUTE PAGE

2008-10-28T13:54:00.000-07:00

I don't get it, I really don't. The Six Million Dollar Man was the quintessential seventies action/adventure show. Everybody loved it, had the toys, it was a huge slice of Americana. Even with all of that the shows STILL haven't been released on DVD. They're out in Europe but not here. Why? They've released shit like Jason Of Star Command but still no Bionic Man, that's just wrong. Anyway, to tide us over I'm posting some awesome Bionic Man moments spanning the shows, the toys and the phenomenon.

STEVE AUSTIN BATTLES BIGFOOT

BIGFOOT AND BIONIC MAN RACING VEHICLES

MASKATRON TOY

STEVE AUSTIN VS MASKATRON

THE EXPOSITION IS WHAT MADE THE SHOW AWESOME

STEVE KICKS ASSSS

MORE STEVE ACTION WITH SONNY BONO

LOUIS ARMSTRONG WAS A GAMER!!

2008-10-27T17:24:00.000-07:00

A DIFFERENT TAKE ON SHEPARD FAIREY'S OBAMA POSTER

2008-10-27T13:29:00.000-07:00

THESE ARE PRETTY FUCKING FUNNY.

HERE'S A REASON TO CANCEL HALLOWEEN

2008-10-27T13:04:00.000-07:00

I had no idea this existed.

Yeah, kill me now.

TRAILER PARK -- NEW TRAILERS AND WEB STUFF

2008-10-24T12:16:00.000-07:00

OK BEFORE WE DO ANYTHING EVERYBODY MUST CHECK OUT STAR WARS CANTINA, IT COULD BE THE MOST BRILLIANT THING INVOLVING BARRY MANILOW EVER.

Star Wars Cantina Song @ Yahoo! Video

Now that we're beyond that a new trailer for the third Underworld has hit. In this one the really really hot Werewolves take on the really really hot Vampires again and....shocker of shockers....the fate of some world hangs in the balance. The ultra hot chick from Doomsday (who is rumored to want to play Catwoman) is in it instead of Kate Beckinsale.

Here's the trailer for the new My Bloody Valentine remake in 3-D. True this film didn't need a remake but this looks like fun plus its not like they were fucking with a classic or anything.

HULK VS THOR TRAILER

2008-10-23T21:44:00.000-07:00

FRIDAY THE 13TH TRAILER -- NOT WHAT YOU SAW ON SCREAM AWARDS

2008-10-23T21:36:00.000-07:00

Friday The 13th

GEEK NEWS FOR WEDNESDAY OCTOBER 22ND

2008-10-22T11:42:00.000-07:00

A fairly slow day today because people are all up in arms about the new Watchmen and Friday The 13th Footage shown at the Scream Awards. The Scream Awards were offensive to me but more on that later, right now here is the Watchmen footage to check out:

Sadly people weren't as generous with the Friday The 13th remake. I have all kinds of problems with this because I loved the first one and even though I dig Jared Papecki in Supernatural this film looks like a hatchet job, no pun intended. Here's the link:

Friday The 13th

My main problem here is that JASON WASN'T IN THE FIRST ONE UNTIL THE END AND HE WAS A KID. THE MASK DIDN'T COME INTO PLAY UNTIL THE THIRD MOVIE!!!!

One of the movies I'm really looking forward to is Quantum Of Solace. I was never a huge James Bond fan because he always just slicked his way out of everything. When I saw Casino Royal I loved it because it showed a meaner less snap-my-fingers-and-wink Bond. Well apparently the original idea was to have Quantum Of Solace be the second act in a three part story arc. Apparently that has changed and the last scene has been cut so that the next Bond film will be a fresh storyline.

While not one frame of Captain America, Thor or The Avengers has been shot Marvel is now saying a Dr. Strange film could see the light of day in 2012 or 2013. It seems like Marvel is rushing this whole idea and the films may suffer. If they fuck up Dr. Strange I'm gonna be pissed

Apparently things have stalled on bringing to life the indie graphic novel Black Hole. Director David Fincher's overly perfectionist ways have snapped the last nerve of Neil Gaimen and Roger Avery who were adapting the comic property to film. Guess we'll see what happens next.

In the newsest installment of "Who Is Gonna Be Catwoman" we offer up Kat McGraw. Rumor has it the star of the ultra shit pile Doomsday has been in meetings to play the femme fatale. THIS IS JUST A RUMOR and follows on the heels of Angelina Jolie and Cher so who knows whats up.

and finally check out the new Watchmen teaser poster.

IANN'S COMIC BOOK FOLDER 10/22/08

2008-10-21T23:16:00.000-07:00

WOLVERINE: MANIFEST DESTINY #1
Logan and the X-Men hit San Francisco which holds a 50 year old secret for Wolverine. Now he's up against a fighter from every dojo around as well as mystical warrior of the Triad. Time to snikt snikt Logan!!

THOR TRUTH #1
A cool looking one shot where Thor and his fellow Asgardians go back to ancient Egypt an leave something that will change the world forever.

SECRET INVASION #7
This is it, the final issue of the Secret Invasion storyline. How will this war with Skrulls end and what has become of the heroes they took over? This will answer all those questions...we hope.

NEW KRYPTON SPECIAL #1
With Superman having rescued the city of Kandor from Brainiac and released it in the arctic bizarre things are happening. What will this mean to the people of Earth and how does it tie in to Jimmy Olsen needing to save Superman from impending death?

INVINCIBLE #54
Fightmaster and Drop Kick return to alter the past but will they get stuck in the time stream instead?

HULK #7
Red Hulk has been defeated, or has he. After the end of issue 6 people, like myself,were really bummed but this issue looks like it may pick up. Involving SHIELD, Red Hulk, She Hulk, Hulk, Las Vegas, and more...could be awesome!!

GOTHAM AT MIDNIGHT #6 of 12
It's October 31st in Gotham City and The Joker is hosting a special Halloween party for two special guests.

DAREDEVIL #112
His wife has been driven insane, he's wracked with guilt and his world is coming apart. As he tries to put his life back in order Matt Murdock gets slapped with Lady Bullseye (yep Lady Bullseye).

DC HALLOWEEN
An annual DC multi-story book where the DC Characters get involved in Halloween themed stories.

CRIMINAL #6
This is an amazing true crime comic that never ceases to impress. This is the 3 part of a 4 part arc involving forger Jacob K who is hiding a dark secret from the woman who has him on the run.

CAPTAIN AMERICA #43
After the end of the long winded but pretty well done Red Skull story arc the new Captain America Bucky Barnes is finally launching into a story of his own. Facing off against an old foe from his Winter Soldier days, can Bucky pull it off as Cap? Brubaker keeps making this an incredible run.

AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #574
After the incredible ending to the New Ways To Die story arc the Spidey team hits us with a story on whatever happened to Flash Gordon. I'm as pissed as anybody about how Marvel keeps fucking with Spider-Man but I have to say the last ten issues of this title have been kick ass.

THE RETURN (YES AGAIN I KNOW) OF GEEK NEWS!!!

2008-10-21T11:05:00.000-07:00

In the never ending battle to see if they can re-make every movie already made Hollywood is going re-make four old school monster classics. Be on the lookout for "I Walked With a Zombie", "Bedlam", "Five Came Back" and "The Body Snatcher".

Daniel Craig apparently turned down the roll of Thor when approached by the studios. I'm glad he did because having James Bond be Thor is almost as lame as...I don't know...having James Bond be Indiana Jones's father.

SPOILER: Apparently the giant squid at the end of The Watchman doesn't appear in the film. Not sure how I feel about it. On the one hand the squid might have looked silly on the other hand it is the way the book ended. I just hope that's the wealth of the liberties they took.

So after Raimi talked all this shit about a getting right on top of the next Evil Dead sequel he has reneged on his promise and claims it's now on the "Back Burner". That essentially means the blowjobs, cocaine and bags of money for Spider-Man (which he said he doubted he's return to) was way too much. Raimi will be directing 4 and 5 of the craptacular Spider Man series next.

Here's something actually cool David Gordon Green (Pineapple Express, Snow Angels) is set to direct the upcoming adaptation of the Freaks Of The Heartland min-series. This story is like Deliverance meets horror meets noir. One of my favorite titles, I hope they don't fuck it all up.

OK THIS PRETTY DAMN AWESOME. These McCain spoof ads are ridiculous, it's worth it alone for the Wes Anderson ad at the end.

OK That's for today

CHECK OUT THIS AWESOME WEBSITE

2008-10-21T01:56:00.000-07:00

This guy spends his time making all kinds of Simpsons type characters out of comic heroes, movie stars, etc. It's pretty fucking awesome. Here is some of his work:

The actual site is: http://www.springfieldpunx.blogspot.com

It's pretty awesome!!

SAMUEL L. JACKSON HAS JUMPED THE SHARK

2008-10-17T22:02:00.000-07:00

When Samuel L Jackson first came across my radar he was what I refer to as a “That Guy”. That Guy is a term I coined for all those bit part actors who you see everywhere but don’t really know who they are. For example Al Leong who has been in everything from episodes of Quincy to Die Hard to playing the guy who tortures Mel Gibson in the first Lethal Weapon is one of the greatest That Guys ever.

When you see him you say “It’s that guy” but you’re not really sure who he is. When I first saw Jackson he was on Spenser For Hire in a bit part. From there I started noticing his face in Coming To America, Do The Right Thing, Exorcist III and so on. I knew his face but it was only when he played drug addict Gator Purify in Spike Lee’s Jungle Fever that I became a huge fan.

At that point in time Jackson was incredibly powerful, his ability to make you hate and cry for Gator was wonderful to watch. I thought to myself that the movie was OK at best but the guy Eddie Murphy beat up in Coming To America was a new acting force to be reckoned with. After that role Jackson’s career seemed to remain within the world of bit parts and great supporting characters.

No matter what he was in Jackson had a way of flushing a part out that kept you riveted. Remember his part as the chain-smoking technician in Jurassic Park? It wasn’t a big part but Jackson made the guy so likable that when he died you were bummed. In short Jackson summed up the idea that there are no small parts just small actors.

The last part I saw Jackson in before the world really discovered him was as the gruff and semi-abusive father in the brilliant movie Fresh. At the end of the film, after spending the entire film yelling at his son from behind a chessboard, Jackson sees his son crying and gives the boy this devastating look.

It’s the last thing in the movie and the look Jackson gives makes you forgive everything he has done up until that point. It’s clear from that look that he loves his son but he’s scared and his gruff exterior is a manifestation of his fear of failing as a father. It’s an incredible scene brought to life by an incredible actor.

Then in 1994 Samuel L Jackson became a household name with his portrayal of mob enforcer Jules Winnfield in the movie Pulp Fiction. I’m not a fan of Pulp Fiction; I found it tedious and dated, relying too much on pop culture in lieu of actual dialog or plot points. However I did love Jules and I spent the entire film just waiting for Jackson to appear on the screen and light up this otherwise dull exercise in cool-guy writing. It was an incredible performance, easily due the hype it was given. It was also, in my opinion, the end of Jackson as an actor.

Post Pulp Fiction Jackson became an attitude, a style, a Bad Ass Motherfucker in nearly every single role he took on. It didn’t happen right away, it was a slow roll that has become who Jackson is now, an actor who has long since jumped the shark. Right after Pulp Fiction Jackson did some films that challenged his ability such as Losing Isaiah and Kiss Of Death but his next hugely successful part in Die Hard III was essentially the Pulp Fiction character as filtered through somebody without criminal tendencies. Jackson’s performances became about him acting tough, yelling, cracking wise and basically trying to be imposing. What had once been just a part of his arsenal was now the only weapon Jackson would draw.

Sphere, Out Of Sight, Jackie Brown, Eve’s Bayou and other films showed Jackson refining this badass acting method. It was subtle at first and became more and more prevalent as time went on. You suddenly knew exactly what Samuel L Jackson being in a movie meant, you could almost hear how he was going to approach every part and you were usually right. The Negotiator finally announced the arrival of the New Samuel L Jackson and from then on that’s all we got.

His role in the new Star Wars films as Mace Windu was one of the most laughable things in the films. Here was a Jedi Knight acting like Jules from Pulp Fiction. I remember everybody wanting to see his lightsaber handle to see if Bad Motherfucker had been etched into it. Granted those movies were horrid things on their own but Jackson didn’t help.

Remember Deep Blue Sea? That film even tried poking fun at Jackson’s bad-ass-will-see-me-through attitude, killing him off in the middle of one of his “We are gonna fucking do this” speeches. When Jackson portrayed Shaft in the unnecessary remake it was nothing at all but Pulp Fiction’s Jules as a cop. There were no dynamics in his performance it was all this surface level tough guy bullshit that made an inferior film even worse.

Even when Jackson tried to challenge himself with movies like The Caveman’s Valentine or Changing Lanes it really was just a subdued version of his standard performance. Those films became fewer and farther between as Jackson opted for movies like XXX, SWAT even his feel good movie Coach Carter was just the same performance but this time with a message.

These days Jackson has completely jumped the shark and left the water. Movies like The Man, Snakes On A Plane and Black Snake Moan showed more than ever how Jackson is content on phoning his performances in and picking up his check. Somehow since Pulp Fiction there has become this air of “If Sam Jackson is in your movie then your movie is COOL” and Jackson seems content on that as opposed to actually trying to use those incredible acting chops I know he still has somewhere.

What’s really sad is that occasionally you see them pop out in films like Freedomland, Resurrecting The Champ or The Cleaner. Jackson makes few of those movies though; it’s much easier to make Lakeview Terrace, which seems more like an SNL sketch about a Samuel L Jackson movie than a movie itself.

Recently Jackson has turned his one-note acting skills to The Spirit in what looks to be an awful turn as Spirit’s archenemy The Octopus. There’s also his next bad comedy Soul Men as well as a sequel to Jumper that I hope is just a rumor. As for Jackson’s turn as Nick Fury in the new Marvel films I have my own problems with that.

I will always see Nick Fury as the Steranko creation not The Ultimates version so right off the bat I don’t like this development. I can also see how Jackson will turn Nick Fury into Jules as the head of a secret Government organization. I would just like to shake Jackson’s hand and say to him “Come on man, enough is enough”.

Will Jackson turn it around? I can only hope he does because at one point he was an incredibly gifted actor. Now it seems as if he’s lost in his own hype, buried under this fear that if he isn’t a tough guy bad ass his career will be over.

I hope that one day he understands how good he really is and how good he once was and can let the character of Jules, which he just continues to play over and over, die a dignified death. If he can do that then perhaps Jackson can become a serious actor again instead of a pop culture footnote.

I RETURN WITH AWESOME MARVEL SHIT

2008-10-17T11:14:00.000-07:00

FIRST CHECK OUT THESE COMICS, GOD I WISH THEY WERE REAL!! THEN WITNESS THE MARVEL SECRET INVASION THEME SONG:

KOOL THINGS #001

2008-09-07T07:47:00.001-07:00

Here are some fucking bad ass things I've found around the web. From toys to sneakers to clothes and so on, these are things on MY Christmas list. Check them out:

Kidrobot released the Dunny Series 5 figures and they of course rock. I'm partial to the robot one myself.

http://www.kidrobot.com

If you need help holding up your pants in an old school way dig these belt buckles. If I had to choose it'd be this Donkey Kong buckle. There's a lot more to choose from so dig it:

http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=5761931§ion_id=5606896

The Dark Knight never seemed as lovable as he does here. Bearbrick stuff is pricey but usually worth it.

http://www.bearbrick.com

Mad Magazine is about to release an anthology of their lampoons of Star Wars throughout the years. Since nothing about Star Wars has been entertaining for the last 15 years this might be a welcome way station.

Another Star Wars item that doesn't suck. This disaster Vader shirt.

http://www.oddica.com

Aliens are attacking, I hope you WPM are up the challenge.

http://www.bb-shopping.com

The guys over at Bathing Ape have released their fall line up. This is easily my favorite item on it.

http://www.bapemall.com

I've always needed a best-dressed sneaker selection Dig these awesome herringbone Tweed jams. Alife NYC does it again.

http://www.alifenyc.com

Here are two Dark Knight pictures I just think kick ass

And finally here is the Theo Huxtable Double Burger of the day. Her name is Caroline D'amour and this is her in full frolic mode.

AWESOME COMMERCIAL RETROSPECTIVE #1

2008-08-30T05:30:00.001-07:00

GEEK NEWS FOR FRIDAY AUGUST 29TH AND THE WEEKEND MOVIE PICKS

2008-08-29T09:57:00.000-07:00

Apparently hack director Brett Ratner wants to make a Guitar Hero movie. Typical.

So director Max Makowski is in line to direct Voltron. He directed One Last Dance the film adaptation of Kung Fu.

Director Vadim Perelman who directed House Of Sand And Spooks will be directing the (oh kill me) Poltergeist remake. Why the fuck do we need that remade? Anyone? Bueller, Bueller?

So here's something weird. Simon Pegg and Zachary Quinto (Scotty and Spock in the new JJ Abrams Star Trek movie) were discussing the film and both said odd things about it. Quinto commented that this Spock is "irrespective" of the other Spock and Pegg said that this is not a continuation but a "New Star Trek". This raises concerns that this is either a alternate universe or re-booting Star Trek as though none of the history ever happened.

Here's the new Max Payne trailer. Everybody is going gaga over this but to me it looks like the same video style action movie that always hits the theater.

'Max Payne' Theatrical Trailer @ Yahoo! Video

THIS COULD BE COOLEST PLACE TO SHIT EVER:

WANT TO BE THE EMPEROR? THEN COUGH OF $5000 TO SIT IN THESE OFFICIAL LUCASFILM REPLICA EMPEROR CHAIRS. "FIRE AT WILL COMMANDER!!" "WHO'S WILL?":

OH AND SO NOW STAR WARS HAS RUN OUT OF NORMAL TOYS TO SHILL SO THEY ARE GOING FOR THEIR CREEPY SELECTION. CHECK THIS OUT:

NOPE THAT'S PHOTOSHOP TRICK THIS IS AN OFFICIAL TOY OF WHEN UNCLE OWEN AND AUNT BARU GET KILLED IN THE FIRST FILM. GOD I HATE GEORGE LUCAS.

OK SO IF YOU'RE GOING TO HIT THE MOVIE THEATERS THIS WEEK HERE ARE THE ROTTEN TOMATO RESULTS FOR THE NEW FILMS. NOW WHEN YOU READ THIS KEEP IN MIND THAT 60% FRESH IS PASSABLE:

BABYLON AD 7% FRESH
HAMLET 2 60%
TRAITOR 51%

AND FINALLY THE THEO HUXTABLE DOUBLE BURGER OF THE DAY IS KRISTIN STEWART. SHE HAD A BIT PART IN INTO THE WILD AS WELL AS OTHER FILMS.

OK ENJOY THE WEEKEND!!

GEEK NEWS FOR THURSDAY AUGUST 28TH

2008-08-28T06:55:00.000-07:00

INDIANA JONES VIDEO. IN THE IMMORTAL WORDS OF TWISTED TOYFARE THEATER "WORDS FAIL DOOM":

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

CHECK OUT THIS AWESOME HOT TOYS HEATH LEDGER JOKER FROM THE BACK ROBBERY SCENE. VERY COOL BUT ALSO $200 BUCKS.

It's been announced there will be a sequel to The Strangers. The actually pretty good thriller with Liv Tyler grossed 52 Million so now the story rolls on. I wonder if it will be a revenge flick from Tyler's side?

Alan Sorkin is writing a movie about the guy who started Facebook. CAN'T WAIT for that to open.

Ron Perlman says there will definitely be a Hellboy 3. Good, maybe this time it won't suck.

Christian Rock Guitar Hero? Good to know video games are on the side of the Lord.

AND FINALLY THE THEO HUXTABLE BURGER OF THE DAY: THIS CHICK WHOSE NAME I DON'T KNOW BUT CHECK OUT HER, HER OUTFIT AND HER STAR WARS TRAMP STAMP. NOW YOU KNOW WHERE TO AIM YOUR "FORCE" WHEN THE TIME IS RIGHT.

GEEK NEWS FOR WEDNESDAY AUGUST 27TH

2008-08-26T11:41:00.000-07:00

CHECK OUT THESE AWESOME FREDDY KRUEGER NIKE SNEAKERS:

Looks like the Hulk will be hitting DVD on October 21st. I might actually buy this.

For those who are amped on the live action Dragonball Z movie (yep, both of you) the trailer will be hitting before the live action version of Max Payne.

Speaking trailer news, apparently the entire original cast of Fast And Furious is back together for More Fastestester More Furiouserererer the even less wanted sequel to the insipid franchise. Here's the trailer:

So after years of talking and kicking it around it looks like HBO won't be doing a Preacher mini-series because they feel its too dark and violent. I persoanlly don't care because I am one of the 6 comic book readers that thinks not only did Preacher suck but Garth Ennis is a fucking hack.

Since everybody seems to be fooled by the Anime Gremlin into thinking Anime is any good (sorry people with big eyes screaming does nothing for me) Marvel is jumping on the Batman tip and releasing Anime films of its characters. Apparently the first one will involve Iron Man and Wolverine. Gee how'd they arrive on this two?

Cheers bartender Woody Harrelson (I know he's had a movie career but I never liked any of them) is going to star in a Zombie comedy titled Zombieland. It's about the last two men on earth and their battles against the undead. Is anybody else tired of zombie movies?

Here's a weird one. Apparently a movie coming out called Squid about a guy who owes money to a Giant Squid. Think I'm kidding, check out the short film that the new movies is based on:

Here's a shocker. Apparently Fox doesn't want anybody in the the press to see Vin Diesel's new futuristic movie Babylon AD because the few who have say it sucks so badly. Meanwhile this musclehead idiot is talking about the TWO new Riddick movies he wants to do even though The Chronicals Of Riddick barely made its money back. Dude, lighten up on the roids, it's effecting your ability to face reality.

CHECK OUT THIS AWESOME VIN DIESEL ANIMATED SHORT:

AND THE THEO HUXTABLE DOUBLE BURGER OF THE WEEK: MONA LEIA:

HELP ME FIND THIS SHIRT

2008-08-25T21:44:00.000-07:00

IF ANYBODY CAN HELP ME FIND THIS T-SHIRT IN XL OR L I'D BE MOST APPRECIATIVE.

OBAMA COMIC MADNESS

2008-08-25T21:43:00.000-07:00

APACHE VS APACHE

2008-08-25T14:15:00.000-07:00

I think this is awesome!!

NOW WATCH THIS:

GEEK NEWS FOR MONDAY 8/25

2008-08-25T08:43:00.000-07:00

So it looks like Michael Keaton will be the voice of a Ken Doll in the upcoming Toy Story 3

Here's the guy who has been approached to not only play Thor but also Connor Mcleod in the unnecessary Highlander Remake. His name is Kevin McKidd:

Kevin Smith says JJ Abrams' Star Trek is "phenomenal". This means nothing to me because Kevin Smith hasn't made a good movie since clerks.

Further proof America is stupid. Tropic Thunder was the number one movie at the box office followed by The House Bunny and Death Race.

The Dark Knight hit 807 million worldwide.

The guy who directed Tropic Thunder is doing a Sherlock Holmes movie with Sacha Baron Cohen as the title character and Will Ferrel as Dr. Watson. Awesome I can hear it now: "Look Watson a crime. Very Niiiiiice" and then "You stay classy London England".

SORRY, NO DOUBLE BURGER FOR THE DAY. DIDN'T SEE ANYONE WORTH IT!!

From Emmanuel Benbihy, the guy who brought you Paris, Je Tame comes New York I Love You. This is a movie about how wonderful being in love and in New York is as seen by people who are wealthy, pretty or don't live in New York all the time. I lived there for 30 years, not as great as they make it seem. Still, looks like a fun date movie. HERE IS THE TRAILER:

"New York I love you" Teaser
by Mollyryan

Here's the trailer for Transporter 3. Yeah, I don't get it either.

MY DVD PICKS FOR TUESDAY 8/26/08

2008-08-24T04:17:00.000-07:00

So I'm starting my DVD picks again but instead of doing them monthly I figured weekly was better. Just so you know these are my picks for the week, there's tons of other stuff you can check out if you want. I just feel like these are the ones I would or could buy. So Here Go:

THE LEGEND OF THE LONE RANGER: Man I guess the comic book/adventure vibe of the summer has forced every movie bean counter to rush out anything that might even remotely look appealing. The Legend Of The Lone Ranger is not a great movie, in fact the guy who plays the Lone Ranger had all of his dialog looped in by another actor. This is a 1981 shlock movie that even I lover of all things Lone Ranger sees as badly done. However it is charming, it will bring back fond memories to those of us who were kids when it came out and Christopher Lloyd as the bad guy is worth the money to me.

NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS 2 DISC COLLECTORS EDITION: I know this movie has become sickening. It's the must have gear for all fat goth girls and suburban alterna-teens. The movie has been re-packaged and re-released to the point of crazy making and Tim Burton has pretty much lost his ability as a director. However this DVD has a lot of cool bonus stuff and an awesome version of the film. When you just sit back and enjoy the movie you can see how wonderful it really is despite the marketing of it.

WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE: This was a great early eighties animated version of the classic tale plus you get five other animated tales from author Maurice Sendak. Everybody can dig on this. Young kids, teens, parents, grandparents, pets, anybody!!

DELICATESSEN: This is an incredibly fucked up movie about a a French apartment building in a post-apocalyptic world. The film, directed by Jean-Pierre Jeunet, is haunting, violent, beautiful and horrific. A real masterpiece.

THE SHIELD SEASON SIX: One of the best schlock cop shows ever. Plays out more like Jerry Springer meets NYPD Blue than anything like Law & Order or The Wire. This is the season where all things come to a head leading into the final season which starts airing soon. Hard to explain if you don't watch but if you do then you'll dig this a lot.

ERROL FLYNN WESTERNS BOX SET: Best known as Robin Hood these four western films by the screen legend are just as awesome. Flynn was the creation of the rugged hero who would later morph into things like Indiana Jones and heroes of that nature. All four films kick ass so check them out.

FAKE DARK KNIGHT 3 POSTERS & BAD JOKER FAN ART

2008-08-23T04:20:00.000-07:00

Some artist decided to make mock ups of Dark Knight Posters for the next movie. I dig Catwoman, hate Riddler but really really like the poster and fake photo of Harley Quinn. It gives me a great idea on bringing her into the Chris Nolan Batman world. I'll be writing the synopsis later on next week. Here are the posters:

I'm all for fan art but this painting is really awful. The Joker looks like an old Bob Dylan. What do you think?

GEEK NEWS FOR THURSDAY 8/21

2008-08-21T11:38:00.000-07:00

Apparently Fox bigwig Tom Rothman is back to his old ways again. He was the guy who fucked up X-Men 3 by trying to make it more kid friendly and now he's doing the same thing with the Wolverine movie. Apparently this idiot is changing sets behind the directors back and adding these insane lighter notions he thinks the public wants to see. Has he learned nothing from Dark Knight. X-Men 3 was a kiddie video game and did ok at the box office. Dark Knight was a brutal adult film and has nearly made a billion. Somebody kill this guy please.

So I gues Jon Favreau has started work on Iron Man 2 for a 2010 release. I'm hoping that instead of Nick Fury at the end of this movie Batman shows up and kicks the shit out of Downey Jr for his childish, jealous and shitty remarks about the Dark Knight film.

Apparently the lead for Kick Ass has been chosen. He's an unknown in America so says writer Mark Millar. I still don't think this movie is a good idea.

Actor Jean Reno who pretty much kicks ass in anything he is in (especially Leon The Cleaner) has taken ill while on vacation. Our thoughts go out to him.

Jesus I Hate Hollywood! Here's the remake trailer for It's Alive the killer baby movie. There was no reason for this movie in the first place so a fucking remake is just ridiculous: HERE IS THE TRAILER

CHECK OUT THIS WEIRD CLAYMATION ZOMBIE MOVIE, FUCKING GORY AS HELL:

VIEW THE STUPIDEST SWEATSHIRT EVER AND I LOVE BATMAN:

AND FINALLY HERE IS THE THEO HUXTABLE DOUBLE BURGER OF THE DAY OLYMPIC JAVELIN THROWER LERYN FRANCO:

GEEK NEWS FOR TUESDAY AUGUST 19TH

2008-08-19T11:19:00.000-07:00

So it looks like Superman is on hold indefinitely because the movie swine are trying to figure out what to do with it next. They say once they figure it out if Bryan Singer is down then great if not they'll find somebody else.

So here's some old news thats back again. Nearly a year ago Paramount sued to not allow Warner Brothers to release Watchman. Apparently Paramount, in some twisted legal way, owns rights to the movie version of the book and now that there's buzz on the film they want to take their ball and go home. Yesterday a judge agreed to let Paramount continue with the suit. I don't care because I'm in agreement with Alan Moore that this movie is going to suck but this is a pretty petty move on Paramount's part.

In something I will add to my list of reasons to die apparently Russel Fucking Crowe has been tapped to star as Bill Hicks in the biopic about the brilliant comic. I look to Hicks as a mentor, I have seen everything on him I can get my hands on and Crowe is so wrong it almost makes Jim Carey seem like the right choice for Kaufman. I hate Hollywood.

Apparently the money makers in the WB video department, happy with the straight to video sequels they turn out, are going to be sending a Deep Blue Sea sequel to a video store near you at some point next year. But without LL Cool J's "Deepest Bluest My Hat Is Like A Shark's Fin" jizzy jizzy jizzam can we expect it to be anywhere near as AWESOME!!!

CHECK OUT MARTY MCFLY HEAD BANGING:

FUCK BLU-RAY, CHECK THIS DVD PLAYER OUT:

THIS MIGHT ACTUALLY GET ME TO PLAY JENGA:

AND FINALLY THE THEO HUXTABLE DOUBLE BURGER OF THE DAY:

THE RETURN OF GEEK NEWS!!

2008-08-18T12:14:00.000-07:00

Since nobody over at Boston.tv knows when a new Dude, That's Awesome will arrive, I figured I'd get back to geek news here:

Apparently Simon Pegg has had to bow out of Quentin Tarantino's Inglorious Bastards due to scheduling conflicts. Since I hate everything Tarantino has ever touched and I love Simon Pegg I find this a thing to rejoice about. Call me silly :)

The scare that Punisher War Zone will be PG-13 has been lifted, it will remain R. If you've seen the trailer is should be rated "s" for SUCK.

Here's an awesome article about Warner Brothers trying to jump start DC Films: http://www.variety.com/article/VR1117990659.html?categoryid=13&cs=1

Apparently Christopher Mintz-Plasse (Mclovin in Superbad) will play the Red Mist, the enemy in Mark Millar's Kick Ass comic which is now being made into a movie. I'm a little weirded out by this since the comic is only on issue 3.

Paul WS Anderson director of such garbage as Resident Evil and Aline Vs Predator has walked away from the years-in-development Spy Hunter movie. Looks like The Rock will either have to do another failed comedy or go back to wrestling.

Kevin Smith says The Watchmen is "Fucking Astounding" and based on that I'm even ore worried the movie will suck.

The teenybopper vampire movie Twilight has replaced Harry Potter And The Umpteenth Film About Him And His Magical Cronies in November. Saying they pushed Potter up because they've made plenty of money off the Dark Knight and want to keep Potter for a juicy summer weekend really displays how much faith they have in Twilight. Since the book and the movie are basically Transylvania 90210 I can understand why.

So the shitheels in Hollywood want to remake Candyman with a white guy as the killer. You get the gasoline, I'll get the rope, chair and matches.

Check out five minutes they cut out of Iron Man:

EVER WONDER WHAT DISNEY WOULD HAVE DONE WITH SIN CITY?

2008-08-18T12:11:00.000-07:00

THE CURSING COUNT

2008-08-16T04:06:00.001-07:00

THE TRIUMPHANT RETURN OF THE FARTING PRIEST!!

2008-08-15T00:19:00.000-07:00

THE GREATEST MARVEL FILM I'VE SEEN YET!!

2008-08-14T11:39:00.001-07:00

WHO WATCHES THE WATCHFRIENDS?

2008-08-13T12:01:00.001-07:00

FURTHER PROOF FRANK MILLER NEEDS TO BE KILLED

2008-08-12T21:41:00.001-07:00

HERE'S THE LATEST SCENES FROM HOW FRANK WILL BE MOUTH RAPING THE CORPSE OF WILL EISNER WITH HIS SPIRIT MOVIE.

THE FIRST COMIC BOOK I EVER READ

2008-08-12T01:44:00.000-07:00

When I was 6 years old my Grandfather worked at a distribution house. Basically all the publishers would send their magazines, books, comics etc to this warehouse and then the warehouse would send all the stuff out to the various stores. I was walking through when I saw this comic book. I only remember flashes of this, my dad helped fill in the rest of the story one day at a comic book shop. We were in Forbidden Planet when I was like 18 or 19 and I saw this issue of Batman. My dad told me that was the first comic I had ever read. Basically I saw this and according to my father became mesmerized by the Joker and the idea that a superhero was dead. Apparently I read it and a junkie was born. I had always been into superheros but usually through these kids read along books plus I read Archie and Peanuts.

Anyway I came across the image of this comic and got pretty excited, figured I'd share it with everybody else.

IANN, KURT LODER AND TRIUMPH

2008-08-06T15:30:00.001-07:00

FOUR MINUTES OF THE UNRELEASED BUFFY ANIMATED SERIES

2008-08-05T13:59:00.000-07:00

DON'T BE MAD, THIS IS ALL THEY MADE.

HEY CHECK OUT THE GOONIES GROWN UP

2008-08-05T13:58:00.000-07:00

COULD THIS MEAN A SEQUEL IS ACTUALLY GOING TO HAPPEN!?

HOLY SHIT THE NEW WOLVERINE TRAILER KICKS ASS!!!

2008-07-30T05:32:00.001-07:00

GREATEST AMERICAN HERO COMIC

2008-07-30T05:17:00.000-07:00

So here's the scoop. Right after William Katt decided to not comeback to do a new season of the Greatest American Hero they tried to re-launch it with a girl and call it the Greatest American Heroine. The pilot wasn't picked up and never aired. I watched it on the DVD collection but i think it's also on youtube. Anyway they announced at Comic Con that a new comic book is coming out continuing the story. However, in order to update it, they've done these webisodes explaining how the niece of the original Greatest American Heroine gets the suit. Here's the first one.

Online Videos by Veoh.com

ZOMBIE ZOMBIE VIDEO!! THE GREATEST THING I'VE SEEN IN AWHILE!!

2008-07-26T10:19:00.000-07:00

NEW JASON VORHEES UPDATED

2008-07-23T12:39:00.001-07:00

1. JASON IS NOT IN HAPE

2. JASON IS NOT 22

3. JASON DOES NOT HAVE A MULLET OR FUCKING HAIR AT ALL

I HATE HOLLYWOOD

NEW JASON VORHEES

2008-07-20T02:12:00.000-07:00

LOOKS LIKE A MALE MODEL WITH A MASK ON.

THE BEST DARK KNIGHT TRAILER EVER

2008-07-19T03:34:00.000-07:00

THE DARK KNIGHT - MY REVIEW

2008-07-18T23:51:00.001-07:00

“You’ve changed things, forever.”

Though that line comes from the mouth of The Joker towards Batman, it could also be applied to director/writer Chris Nolan’s take on how to create a comic book film. The geek explosion has sent Hollywood scrambling into Comic Conventions in a feeding frenzy to get the newest hot property. While the movies that have come out have ranged from the awful (Spider-Man, Punisher) to the passable (X-Men, Superman Returns) to the actually pretty entertaining (Iron Man, The Incredible Hulk) none of them have managed to pass the threshold of being a comic book movie into the world of just being great films. No matter how enjoyable they were, they felt like comic book movies and a few more like video games. The genre of great movies based on comic books was usually left to films like Road To Perdition, Ghost World or American Splendor. Superheroes were left out of that equation.

The Dark Knight is an incredible, nearly flawless film, period. It’s not a great action movie, a great comic book movie or a great “popcorn movie” (a term I see as a cop-out) it’s just a great film. Nolan has created a multi-layered, deeply psychological and intricate crime drama that happens to involve a guy dressed as a bat going after a guy dressed like a clown. Don’t get me wrong, there’s action galore in the Dark Knight but not at the expense of the story or the script.

The obvious performance to start with is Heath Ledger’s Joker, which is so wonderful, so brilliantly executed if he’s not nominated for an Oscar this year then something is seriously wrong. I’ve been reading Batman for 30 years and for nearly twenty of those years I have waited for somebody to play The Joker the right way and Ledger nails it. He is The Joker, he is the madman that Bob Kane and Bill Finger created and that Denis O’Neil and Neal Adams perfected. There is none of the campy silliness that made Jack Nicholson’s performance so hard to stomach. Ledger is much more focused on making his Joker actually scary. Moving his limbs like a spastic, licking the wounds that give him his permanent smile and darting his eyes around like a drug addict Ledger makes you uneasy when he’s on screen. You never know what he’s going to do next and that’s what The Joker is all about. That is also what everyone who has ever played him before has failed to realize. The Joker isn’t funny he’s fucking evil and insane.

My hat is also off to Ledger for avoiding the slippery slope of playing the over-the-top criminal and not making him the man we love to hate. At no point does Ledger lose sight of the fact that The Joker is evil, cruel and mean spirited. Nicholson made his Joker flamboyant and filled with crackling one-liners. That’s not Ledger’s game at all; he understood what The Joker really is. From the make up to the voice to the performance itself, this is how The Joker was supposed to be played, this is the comic book character come to life. For someone like me who has been obsessed with the character his whole life it was pure joy to watch it finally done right.

Though all of the focus has been on Ledger, as has the Oscar Buzz, I think they’d be remiss if they didn’t also give some consideration to Christian Bale. His Batman is not as flashy or in your face as The Joker and that’s a true testament to Bale’s acting chops. Bale isn’t afraid to lay back in his performance and let Ledger take center stage. When they are on screen together Bale keeps up with Ledger at every pass but uses subtly and nuance to make his stand. Bale also does a great job of making Batman troubled and brooding without being annoying or self-pitying. You really believe that he wants to do good things but can’t figure out how to do it without endangering the people he loves or creating more escalation. In the final stages of the movie, when Batman realizes he must be what Gotham needs even if that isn’t being the hero, it really is moving.

Once again the supporting cast is first rate, really a pleasure to watch. Morgan Freeman’s Lucious Fox is just awesome, every minute he’s on screen you just love the guy more and more. Gary Oldman, largely known for playing psychopaths, is the perfect Jim Gordon. He’s tough but caring, he’s a realist who wants to be an idealist but those just aren’t his circumstances. Even Maggie Gyllenhaal is great as the new Rachel Dawes. I was pleased she stepped into the role because the Dawes character is given way more to do in this film and I don’t think Katie Holmes (the first Rachel Dawes) was up to the challenge. Even Eric Roberts is good (a real testament to Chris Nolan’s ability as a director) as a Gotham Mob Boss.

The last of this supporting crew is Aaron Eckhart who seriously rises to the occasion as both Harvey Dent and Two Face. I’ll be honest I was not a believer in Eckhart as the choice for Dent and I was wrong. What makes this character work is that you believe his transformation, you can see how the good man in Dent is pushed to his limits and his need for justice becomes clouded by revenge, especially once he becomes disfigured. Eckhart plays Dent perfectly, a shining white knight, the good guy’s good guy and you totally believe him. You want this guy to be the man protecting you from the Mob and that makes his fall so much more tragic. Eckhart does such an incredible 180 when he turns to Two Face and Nolan writes such a believable fall from grace that it almost becomes Shakespearean in its scope.

All of this is under the tight reigns of Chris Nolan who clearly loves the Batman character and that makes all the difference. With Ed Norton’s Hulk and Jon Favreau’s Iron Man I believed those directors loved the idea but didn’t really know the hero, they didn’t seem to know what made him tick. Nolan sees and understands those nuances and brings out things in this film that only those who run deep in the Batman lore would pick up on. Nolan also manages to bring out the best in his actors. He can also weave several plotlines together without making the film feel bulky or convoluted. His shining moment in The Dark Knight is that he’s essentially made two movies in one. The story begins, then when it arcs a second story begins, the first one ends and then the new one arcs. It’s not just a really awesome display of script writing and directing but also editing.

Are there flaws? I suppose if somebody put a gun to my head I could pick out a couple. They still haven’t gotten around the silly voice Christian Bale uses when in the Batman outfit and there is a side plotline with a weasel guy who works at Wayne Enterprises that is unnecessary but I am seriously nitpicking here. The Dark Knight is an extraordinary picture that demolishes all the lines between comic book movie and regular films. As I said, I think Nolan has changed things and I’m hoping more directors will take this approach to bringing comic book icons to life.

THE WATCHMAN TRAILER

2008-07-17T14:17:00.000-07:00

IT LOOKS GREAT BUT SO DID THE HELLBOY 2 TRAILER, WHAT DO YOU THINK? CLICK THE BANNER AND FIND OUT.

INVINCIBLE TRAILER

2008-07-17T03:12:00.000-07:00

THIS DOESN'T LOOK VERY GOOD JUST CLICK THE BANNER BELOW

TERMINATOR: SALVATION TRAILER

2008-07-16T21:22:00.000-07:00

MY REVIEW - HELLBOY 2: THE GOLDEN ARMY

2008-07-16T06:58:00.000-07:00

A few months ago I was watching the trailer for Hellboy 2 and I was really excited. The only thing wrong was this small and yet extremely tenacious part of my brain that said, over and over:

“The trailer for the first movie rocked and the film was not great”

I ignored it though and I had plenty of reason to. Guillermo Del Toro, when first making Hellboy, hadn’t made his bones in Hollywood yet, he didn’t have the power to usurp the command of the Holy Bean Counters and make the movie he wanted to make. Since then he’s had success with The Devil’s Backbone, The Orphanage and Pans Labyrinth, each film successful not only in his homeland but also in America which added to his allure as an auteur filmmaker for this generation. With that behind him I figured Hellboy 2: The Golden Army would be an amazing feast for the eyes as well as the mind.

It would turn out I was half right.

For those who don’t know Hellboy 2 is the return to the silver screen for comic book writer/artist Mike Mignola’s beloved character. Hellboy and his cohorts Abe Sapien a clairvoyant empathic who looks like hybrid between fish and man, Liz Sherman the human emotional heart of the team who can control fire, and newcomer Johann Strauss a German operative whose spirit is contained inside a bizarre armor. In the film things have gotten dire, the romance between Liz and Hellboy is souring, the public has found out about Hellboy and all of this happens right when their new enemy Prince Nuada has resurfaced to begin a war with mankind.

As it turns out the very irate Nuada was the son of a great king who, once upon a time, had created an unstoppable Golden Army of robots to help win the war between his magical and elemental kind and mankind who were trying to take over. With a heavy heart seeing the destruction the Golden Army caused the King takes the golden crown he wears that controls the army and splits it into two pieces, one for himself and the other for mankind. This brings about a peace that lasts for centuries. However Prince Nuada will not rest until he destroys mankind so he goes off in exile and then returns in the present day to kick ass. That’s essentially the story.

First to what works. Hellboy 2 looks glorious, the scale of the creatures, the effects, the whimsy and imagination behind each and every member of the paranormal society we get a peek into is extraordinary. Much like Pans Labyrinth Del Toro takes his love of myth and storytelling to create new twists on old ideas (such as his amazing take on the Toothfairy) or creates completely new and interesting characters that you want to know more about instantly. Every time some new creature comes on screen you are mesmerized, completely drawn in to the details of the monster, troll or what have you. The make up and visual effects are both astonishing and really quite beautiful.

The sections of the movie dealing with Prince Nuada are really wonderful as well. Newcomer Luke Goss gives a nicely nuanced performance with Nuada making him diabolical but also an enemy we understand. All of his actions are to keep his race from dying out and though misguided they are not simply evil. Nuada’s sister (Princess Nuala) portrayed by Anna Walton also lights up the screen with her subtlety and sadness. You feel that while on opposite sides of the war, these two love each other and hate seeing the other torn apart by the conflict. Del Toro does a solid job fleshing these two characters out and making the audience conflicted about their cause. The action scenes are also first rate, nobody can create awesome action with great fantasy like Del Toro and Hellboy 2 is no exception.

The problem comes with the rest of the movie, which falls so flat it became hard for me to sit through it. Del Toro wrote the script himself and I don’t know if it’s his broken grasp on the English language or too much TV viewing but the dialog is horribly clunky and badly written. The snappy one-liners fall flat, the emotional scenes generate more giggles than sighs and the film never can decide what it wants to be. Sometimes it’s a fantasy film, sometimes a comic book movie, other times a film noir and then wacky comedy and finally action film. Hellboy 2 never settles into a solid tone and therefore everything it tries seems halfhearted and unfinished. In short the film seems sloppy and thrown together.

To me it felt as if Del Toro spent a lot time crafting the look and the story of Prince Nuada and then wrote the rest of the film as he went along. Hellboy is taken from cynical and tough to goofy and pushy, Abe Sapien seems almost girlish and Selma Blair’s performance as Liz Sherman is pretty much phoned in. We’re supposed to believe these three are our best defense against evil but instead they just seem buffoonish. The romance between Liz and Hellboy is also badly handled, there is no chemistry and Sherman is basically used as a way to get from scene to scene. If the scene dictates she’s caring she is, bitchy she is, strong she is, sad she is but with no rhyme or reason. I’m assuming this was to try and display her broken psyche but instead it comes off as a cheap plot device to get Hellboy to do what he needs to. They even throw in a pregnancy half way through the film that any third grader can predict will come in later to make Hellboy rise to the occasion. There is also a really mishandled budding romance between Abe and Princess Nuala which just drags the movie down and also gives us the stupidest scene in the film as well as song that has no place in it.

There are also storylines introduced that go nowhere and make little sense. First is Hellboy’s constant desire to try and expose himself and his partners to the public at large. The whole point is secrecy, the whole thing is live in the shadows and yet here’s Hellboy putting everybody on the line to become what, a media sensation? They start this plotline, and then use it to move the script along and then never resolve it. We never know why he does this, which is frustrating because it also makes no sense. There’s this tension between Hellboy and his boss Tom Manning (the always awesome Jeffrey Tambor) that is so volatile but never explained, even when it’s brought back at the end of the movie. The end dear God the end of the movie is awful but more on that in a minute.

The plotline that is least flushed out is also the most interesting one, the idea that Hellboy might join the other side. Prince Nuada starts filling Hellboy’s head with the idea that he is one of them not one of us, which is further proven by the world’s reaction to Hellboy when he’s exposed. Society by and large hates or fears him, they ridicule and torment even though he’s trying to save them. Then, about half way through the movie, that whole thing just ends. We’re supposed to understand he chose to be with Liz Sherman because of love even though that’s never said and the conflict is never resolved. You’re left really wanting to see how Hellboy deals with this but instead we’re thrown a Love Boat pat and annoying answer.

The worst part of the whole thing is the end, which pushed the film from Bad to Awful for me. When we first meet Prince Nuada and his sister a detail is revealed that makes how Nuada is defeated so easy to predict it’s laughable. Why Del Toro didn’t save this until the end of the film is beyond me, it just totally takes any tension away from the final battle. I guess he needed to tell us said detail so he could use it to create the tragic third act dilemma that will push through the end of the film. To me a talent like Del Toro could have thought of something better and less anti-climactic. Even when the impressive Golden Army makes its appearance you don’t really care, you’re just waiting for the end you know is coming. The end is also ruined by the very last shot; seriously the exchange between Liz Sherman and Hellboy will have you Douche Chilled for hours.

This was a disappointing movie and probably the end of the franchise though they did set it up for a third film. Everything that made Hellboy the comic great is gone here. There is no mood, no atmosphere, Hellboy is a lout instead of a brooding anti-hero, it’s all-just too video came kitschy for me. If there is a third movie I hope Del Toro watches Devil’s Backbone and Pans Labyrinth again and draws inspiration off of those movies, Hellboy deserves better than this.

NEW SPIRIT TRAILER

2008-07-16T05:44:00.001-07:00

AND MAN DOES IT SUCK!

CHECK OUT KITTS SECRET

2008-07-15T04:10:00.000-07:00

ERNIE N BERT RUNNIN GANGSTA SHIT

2008-07-13T20:11:00.001-07:00

NEW MAX PAYNE TRAILER

2008-07-12T20:50:00.000-07:00

DAILY DUDE THAT'S AWESOME--BETA

2008-07-08T13:46:00.001-07:00

SO THESE ARE TEST SHOWS FOR DAILY DUDE THAT'S AWESOME INSTEAD OF A WEEKLY SHOW. LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU GUYS THINK!!

TUESDAY--IN NEED OF AN ASS KICKING

WEDNESDAY--NEW COMIC BOOK DAY

THURSDAY--HOLLYWOOD HYPE

THERE WILL ALSO BE A FRIDAY NEW MOVIE RELEASES SEGMENT AND SOMETHING FOR MONDAY.

NEW BOND TRAILER LOOKS AWESOME!!!

2008-06-30T04:56:00.001-07:00

DUDE THAT'S AWESOME #11

2008-06-25T10:29:00.001-07:00

GEORGE CARLIN HAS PASSED AWAY--ANOTHER SOLIDER LOST

2008-06-23T05:03:00.000-07:00

I'm not one who is usually at a loss for words but today is one of those days for me. George Carlin's passing is not only the loss of a soldier in the constant battle to push the truth and try and create a world of critical thinkers but one of the Generals. I've been fortunate enough to be counted amongst those who are constantly questioning and criticizing the world we live in and even luckier that people, for some reason, listen on some level. I took my inspiration from people like Hunter S Thompson, Bill Hicks, Kerouac, Burroughs, Richard Pryor, Lester Bangs, the early punk and no wave bands, Ian Mackaye and all of that started with Carlin.

Carlin was obviously not the first critical thinker nor the first to question america but he was the smartest in his ability to circumnavigate direct attacks and really use humor and satire to prove his point. Carlin was amazing in that as he got older instead of relaxing his attacks, or settling into what most comics do with a sitcom and a tour of Las Vegas with easily palatable "Man this was wacky..." humor he got more aggressive. Carlin started in the 60s and didn't stop raging until the day he passed from this earth. If more people were like this maybe the world wouldn't be in the shape it is.

I never got to meet George Carlin but I did see him perform and I have watched all of his concerts on video and just about memorized them. In my own way I will miss him terribly and it also worries me because now I can say that almost all if not all of my heroes are dead and I see nobody stepping in to fill those shoes.

Carlin passed away of Heart Failure, which amazes me because it seemed as though his heart was too big for that.

GEROGE CARLIN RIP